Letters To You

2011-09-26T00:37:00.000+08:00

I've moved.

www.italkyoushut-okays.blogspot.com

2011-07-23T00:45:00.002+08:00

2011-07-21T23:07:00.002+08:00

Mine's (:

VIRGO - The One that Waits
Dominant in relationships. Someone loves them right now. Always wants the last word.. Caring. Smart. Loud. Loyal. Easy to talk to. Everything you ever wanted. Easy to please. A pushover. Loves to gamble and take chances. Needs to have the last say in everything.. They think they know everything and usually do. Respectful to others but you will quickly lose their respect if you do something untrustworthy towards them and never regain respect. They do not forgive and never forget. The one and only.

Mok's. hehhehe. this is so him!
TAURUS - The Tramp
Aggressive. Loves being in long relationships. Likes to give a good fight. Fight for what they want. Can be annoying at times, but for the love of attention. Extremely outgoing. Loves to help people in times of need. Good kisser. Good personality. Stubborn. A caring person. They can be self centered and if they want something they will do anything to get it. They love to sleep and can be lazy. One of a kind. Not one to mess with. Are the most attractive people on earth!

2011-07-21T21:15:00.004+08:00

I'm freaking bored. I'm suppose to do my BEV and POA work but i'm freaking lazy. mok not here to motivate me :( boooo! Mok sleeping and that's explain everything. Imma such a happy girl this past few weeks. I've make some changes in myself and hopefully it keep on going for the rest of my life, insyallah. Beside that, I'm so happy that I managed to understand all the POA sheets now. like the balance acct, credit n debit thingy. If only I'm not lazy from the start...... hehehehehee.

So basically, I had an awesome day spent with them yesterday although it was a short meetup. I went off quite earlier with Shida after durrah left cos I'm meeting mok. so yeah, we meetup at tamp small mac and off to grandlink. I had so much laughter that I can't hardly breath after laughing. Sang alot of song and now those song stuck in my head.

Dearest girls, I really appreciate that each and everyone of you make an effort to come down yesterday. I can't explain how happy I am yesterday. Despite all those fights, bitching, ego and whatever shits that we gone through, we managed to make it and solve everything. hope this friendship last till eternity. insyallah.

i love the fact that my hair look smooth and silky here. hehee. but naturally, buhooo :(

Fafa Fruitella ♥

Shidah Siow♥

atiqah durrah♥

Nadhirah Natasha♥

meet my gemok! ((:

I've been wanting to post mok picture here but I know he won't like it. My mok selalu shy shy! hehehee. I miss him alot like seriously. :( When i think about you, i smile for no reason. You just make me happy. You're the best thing I've ever had ! Truly, madly, deeply in love with you.

I don't know how long this will last but what I know I'll fight for it till the end. Like what mok always said, ader jodoh tk kemana. (:

Andai takdir kita tak bersama,

selama jasad masih bernyawa,

tak mungkin kau dapat ku lupa.

Andai takdir memisahkan kita,

tak bersatu di bumi yang fana,

ku damba dikau di syurga.

mok, sing for me puisi cinta again please every night. hehehee.

One thing about me is Jealousy. And it is seriously an ugly disease for me. :/

2011-07-19T23:44:00.005+08:00

I don't smoke, drink, or party every weekend. I don't sleep around or start drama to get attention. Yes, we still do exist.

I know I’m not perfect, and I don’t live to be. But before you start pointing fingers, make sure your own hands are clean. I may not be perfect, but I love everything about myself, family and my dearest friends, and appreciate everything I have.

I'm that girl. The one who purposely puts up a status, with a quotes explaining how she really feels for you.

A man who treats his woman like a princess is proof that he has been born & raised in the arms of a queen and i love you so much baby for treating me like a princess. for being extremely patience with me. for loving me. loving me like your own family. and for proving to me that there's still man instead of jerk in this world.

2011-07-09T12:00:00.003+08:00

Cause you're the apple to my pie

You're the straw to my berry

You're the smoke to my high

Ok. I'm hungry. I nak macdonald, I nak ayam arnold, nak ayam kfc. nak semuanye laaa. I'm not working today but my eyes doesn't want to cooperate with me to sleep back. sighhhhhhhh. monday dah buka skola. and that make another sighhhh. I'm not looking foward for projects and all. I have not touch a single thingy on my project works all. i really need to buck up. two warning letters have been received. I don't want to disappoint mum especially. I need to end this 2 year course. I don't want to stop here. what's about my future if i were to stop with a only nitec cert when i can get H.nitec cert. insyallah, i'll do better. (:

OK. I'M HUNGRY! nk cry can? :(

beside that, i miss mok. I miss him alots. :/ mok sick. pity him. get well soon shayang. nanti dah baik kiter go makan kfc lagi okayy? hehheee.

nk carik makan ahhhh. byeeee ((:

2011-06-27T22:37:00.005+08:00

helllo! (:

sorry for the absence.

life have been great. prefectly fine. alhamdulilah. thanks allah. (:

I finally am seeing the rainbow after those rain. insyallah.

You know what, i wouldn't want to tread you for anything else in this world.

I know it seem so fast that i move on. no it not fast ok. all those tears and times.wasted just like that.

but all i can say its too early for anything. what i know, i love you so much mok and i don't want to lose anyone in my life anymore, again. Especially my family, friends and you. i love you so muchy much mok! (:

Biarlah kehilangan semua yang dimiliki di dunia

Asal masih adanya kamu

Di kala penuh ketakutan dengan badai kehidupan

Ku bersyukur adanya kamu
Kasihku ku amat mencintai kamu
Kerana kau beri erti hidup
Ku kan terus mencinta sedetik lebih selepas selamanya
sedetik lebih by anuar zain. for you sayang! (:

2011-06-04T11:12:00.000+08:00

The type of man I want :

Jadilah seorang lelaki yang beriman… Yang hatinya disalut rasa taqwa kepada Allah. Yang solatnya adalah maruah dirinya. Yang tidak pernah takut untuk berkata benar. Yang tidak pernah gentar untuk melawan nafsu. Yang berjuang di sisi Allah.

2011-05-29T23:05:00.003+08:00

I feel so good this morning, after long hours of sleep, omg. It feels great please.

Spent the whole day with family was totally awesome. shop with ibu for my daily stuff. had heart to heart talk with her. No one can ever replaced my ibu laaa. And I'll be getting my specs tomorrow, hopefully! I can't wait to get my baby Iphone 4 la. feel so jealous seeing people around me changing phone. Ibu said either thursday or friday depending on her working timing.

School start at 10 tomorrow and I'll be working in the afternoon. Hopefully school end earlier tomorrow so that i can go and take my specs. If not, must wait for tuesday. Like seriously I can't wait laaaa.

And people being sarcastic, mean, ridiculous or just anything bad to me, well,
you know what, someday, I don't mind returning you the same exact favor when you least expect it.
Take care. :D

2011-05-29T01:59:00.005+08:00

hello shayang shayang! muahaha.

Sorry for the absence. Been lazy to update but i got alot la to update la. Life have been ups and downs. Kadang2 okay. kadang tk. Well, if life have been bitch, I will alwa

ys told myself, it's okay. Just go with it cos this is life. Just find something to cheer yourself up. Fcuk all the negative feelings and thought and people. Think for those who care and treasure you!

I'm not saying I'm totally fine here. But I'm glad I'm doing better day by day. Yahhhh. At times, I can't deny that I been crying thinking what will happened to me in the future, what did I do to deserve all the shits that I've gone through. Why life been unfair towards me. But hey, Like I said, this is life. Everyone gone through disappointment, hatred, love, happiness!

I think I like someone ahhh. saper lagi kalau bukan gemok bestfriend. memang like pun. dier baikkk but I'm unsure of this feeling. But seriouslyzx I'm avoiding it. I'm scared to be in love again. History will repeat again and again. Same things will surely happened again and again. Takot ahh nk sayang orang lagi. Takot ahh nk cinta cinta lagi. Takot ahhh!!

Beside that, I'm not totally over azroy. I don't want things to happened again like what I did to hendra or haslan. yes, i'm almost there. Just a litter chop chop mini time and I'll be allright and forget all those shitzxs that I've gone through with royy. So the best way is to just stay happy by my own and beloved family and friends. Beside that, sometimes the best way to stay close to someone you love is to be friends, nothing more and nothing less. True kan? Because it takes nothing to destroy a friendship cause we tend to treasure friendship alot. But it will take a few minutes or even worst second to destroy a relationship and act like a stranger. like me and roy. biarlahhh. if he think that make him happy, let him be la.

anyway, thank you abah for buying me the victoria secret perfume but have to share with adek ah. But still, it's better than nothing. Abah shooo sweet sey. He brought himself and ibu a couple watch. heheee. Cute rightttt.

I'm owning my baby iphone 4 white by next week. yeahhhh! Thank you so much ibu! me lurp chaaa shooo much! and and ibu brought me new specs tooo! how can i not be shoo in love with ibu cos she pampered me like a lot la nowww! heheee.

Oklahhh. dahhh ngantok. mata sudahhh tk tahsan la shayang. nights! assalamualaikum! (:

2011-05-23T22:38:00.002+08:00

I'm back for updates people. :D

I'm so stress with school. :( Higher Nitec life seem so hard for me. The subject all are killing me manxzs! But insyallah, I'm not gonna to give it up just like that. Well, studies maner yg senang. I took the challenge and now i'm gonna make it to the end, insyallah. :D I wanna have a bright and better future. yg penting, jangan give uppp. cheyyy! motivating myself. hehee. I tknk hampakan ibu. I know she putting high hopes on me.

I'm planning to un-private my blog cos dah reach more than 100 readers. lagi2, i dah tk active on facebook. and yaaa, talking about facebook, i think i'm gonna activate my facebook soon uhhh. I don't know when but soon laa. ramai sms me tanyer pasal facebook. ader sampai email me. hehee. cute uhh korg. I'm so glad with to have such a wonderful people that care and concern about me. sayang korg!

Yesterday celebrate abang birthday at Sakura Downtown East. Best best best! I've yet to upload all those pictures. Soon okaysx i upload. Had so much laughter with beloved family with wak ti and wak dom and wak lim family! Hope to have more of this kindda outing soon!

I meet my budak gemok just now! Really had so much laughter. Thank you for making me laugh like nobody business. Thank you for all the jokes and laughter. nk lagi boleeee? hehehee. *cheeky smileeee* sayang bestfriend! (:

Anddddddddd yaaaaaaaaaaaa, besok mark 7th monthsary? u masih ingat tk? i bet tk kan. well, whatever it is, happy 7th! I gonna make this normal 7th like how i make my day without you for the past few weeks. insyallah i boleh. sorry people yang ask me about him and i cakap i tk kenal dier. i dah malas uh nk buka file pasal dier. penatzxs! :P

My blogskin bosan uhhhhh. Nk change sooon! :D

2011-05-20T21:39:00.002+08:00

I know you are there Allah. I know you see my tears. I know you hear my prayers. I know you are testing me. And all I ask from you is to strengthen my Iman so I can handle the struggles in life and have patience. Please keep me safe from all this shit that happening in my life.

Oklahhhhh. life for me been good so far alhamdulilah.

Im fine though , i've never said i've moved on or shits like that but im perfectly fine now .
but seriously its normal to just like weep at times cause i miss azroy i don't find it a need now cause what for? He is happy so i think i should be happy too cause seeing him happy with everything he have now.

Seeing me cry at my worst and helping me and backing me up when im seriously falling, wipe my tears away when you know it won't stop there, patted my back to just hope i'll stop crying and thank you so much for those never ending be strong and things like that, i seriously thank you people so much for all those hopes and advices and to everything .Thank you so much people. i love you guys so much.

I had so much fun of laughter with twin and fiza just now.firstly accompany iqah go to get her pants and cut hair. heheee. had so much fun tooo! I love everyone around me so much. they never failed to make me laugh like nobody business! ((:

trust me, when i'm with my girlfriends or anyone I can laugh out like no one business. It's just when night, I start to think bukan2. hate it sia. luckily ader mok bestfriend with me. Mok, thank you so much. Mok belanja me makan long john yesterdayyy. hehhee. thanks mok! really, i had so much laughter with you sey mok. You make me go ulalalalalala! :DD i can be myself when i'm with you. (:

I miss mok bestfriend so much. Mok, can home from work faster please? If you're not here, I will think on what I shouldn't think laaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaa. :( Beside that, I miss you la mok. :P

2011-05-20T21:32:00.001+08:00

Yang dicari; walau bukan putera raja, biarlah putera agama. Yang diimpi, biarlah tak punya rupa, asal sedap dipandang mata. Yang dinilai, bukan sempurna sifat jasmani, asalkan sihat rohani dan hati. Yang diharap, bukan jihad pada semangat, asal perjuangannya ada matlamat. Yang datang, tak perlu rijal yang gemilang, kerana diri ini serikandi dengan silam yang kelam. Yang dinanti, bukan lamaran dengan permata, cukuplah akad dan janji setia. Dan yg akan terjadi, andai tak sama dgn kehendak hati, insyaAllah ku redha ketetapan Ilahi.

2011-05-20T21:30:00.000+08:00

While you scream at your woman, there’s a man wishing he could whisper softly in her ear. While you humiliate, offend and insult her, there’s a man flirting with her and reminding her how wonderful she is. While you hurt your woman, there’s a man wishing he could make love to her. While you make your woman cry there’s a man stealing smiles from her.

2011-05-19T21:35:00.003+08:00

"Every relationship goes through stages. Where and how each stage develops is ultimately up to each person. While we always hope for the best, we often can't avoid the inevitable. "

True enough. Sometimes, when we hope that the things we want, the things we been holding on for so long, if it's not meant to be, it will never meant to be how hard we try so much. I learned to accept the fact you're no longer mine. I've learned to accept the fact that you are happily without me, having fun with your life.

Sometimes, I just wish that I can read through on your mind. On what you been thinking, on what's on your mind? Have you ever think of me after you leave me hanging? Don't you feel regret? and mostly, don't you miss me? don't you miss the times that we had? But it hurt me much more to think that way. Why must I think that way when I'm pretty sure that you're not thinking of me at all.

I thank god still, for not letting us meet each other at school. It would be pretty awkward for us to act like a stranger. Worst, you made a new facebook yet you didn't add me up. You even add your ex that have busted you, the ex that you always hate but why me, you didn't? This lady who have done so much for you for the past 6 months.This lady who love you like hell. this lady who willing to go through every shits with you yet you throw her away and treat her like a stranger.

It's okay. This lady have her friends and family still who loves her. In fact, I'm grateful that Allah love me and still giving a chance to live in this world to change for the better. It's okay, this lady will stay strong eventhough how it hurt seeing with other girls, seeing you on facebook with other girls, seeing you living your life happily without her. It's okay. One day you realize how much this lady meant to you. :')

I even when to the extend and delete my facebook. I mean deactivated my facebook account. But i'll be back on facebook once I can accept the fact and calm myself in a better way. The reason why i deactivate my account is simply simple. I don't want to keep hurting myself seeing you on facebook eventhough I didn't get to see your wall. Seeing you posting at your friends status all, adding girls and all. You even went to the club. Ya allah. :'( How it's hurt to be me. I always thought you are the one for me. I hope too much till I get this after breaking up in an improper way.

I can't deny the fact how much angry I am towards you. How much I hate you that I can't stand seeing your face! That I even said that I can't forgive on what you did to me dunia and akhirat. I swear I won't be able to forgive on what you did towards me. No, it's not because I hate you so much. It's just that, I hate the way you leave me, hanging. You can simply tell me the truth. You don't need to throw me away just like that. Making me suffer and cry and being emotional not myself. You said you hate seeing me being hurt, crying and all. But don't you realize all this while, i've been crying, been hurt all by you and your action. But I choose to stay and not give up. Because my reason are simply simple, I choose to be in a relationship with you and that's mean I want to be with you and only you. I won't give up on you. But yet, you choose to leave. You broke up your promises. :/ You said you wanna be with me till your last breath. remember you said that on you 17th birthday celebration? :( But why must all this happening.

No. I tak menyesal. I redha with whatever have happened. I believe allah have the reason for everything that have happened. Allah know whats the best for me. But it hurt me to the pieces seeing us like a stranger now. :(

Like what people said :

Stage 1: Meeting

Stage 2: The Chase

Stage 3: Honeymoon

Stage 4: Comfortable

Stage 5: Tolerance

Stage 6: Downhill

Stage 7: Breaking up

(unfortunately they left out)

Stage 8: remembering... :'(

A million words would not bring you back. I knew it because I've tried. Neither would a million tears, I knew it because I've cried. No, even if you were to come back, things won't be the same. History repeat twice, and I won't let it repeat again.

When someone walks out of your life, let them be. There's no use in wasting your time on people that leave you. What make you of yourself and your future is no longer tied with them. Yeah, you may miss them. But remember you weren't the one that gave up.

I'll do anything to make myself Happy, smile and enjoy my life. Making my life more meaningful and treasuring everyone around me. Insyallah. Guide me allah. (:

2011-04-11T01:54:00.003+08:00

Okayzxsxszs! I'm glad tauu everything is fineee. :D Nak tauuu apesal? Pasal i malas ahh nak gaduh2 dengan boyfriend! Pasal i nak things get better between us! Pasal i love you! pasal i cintakan you banyak2!

I tk macam u uhhh b sanggup 2 weeks tk msg/call i semuaanyyeee! i tk bolehhh! dua minit pun i tk sanggup tauu nk bermusuh! ((:

And i find this super cute. walaupun i marah2 dengan u, u still know how to make me laugh and smile baby! bodoh kan. orang dah buat marah pun tetap i still can smile. cos simply, i believe u dun only deserve 2nd chance but always stand a chance in my heart! love youuuuuu.

oklahhh! nk tdo. assalamuailaikum semua! mwahs! yeah yeah! sok skola! lagi baper jam ajeee. dapat jumper boyfriend and kawan2! mwahhhhhhhhh!

2011-04-10T11:21:00.003+08:00

Okayxzs! selamat pagi semua! assalamualaikum. ((:

I'm awakeee. siangg kann. heeheee. Well, well, I need to learn how to control myself and be strong. Im tired of sedih2, parah2 hati and whatever shit it is. Hidup cumer sekali, I must app what i have now cos i wont knew when it will be gone.

So jyeahh! I miss schooling and besok dah start sekolahhh! Yeah yeah! I'm so excited for it.

Nak makan cafe 1. dapat jumper kawan2 balik. but so sad cos i dun get the same kelas with fiqa and eyfa. sad. :(( But harap2 what they plan is not confirmed uhhh. I want to have the same kelas with my girls. Malas uhh nk buat kawan2 baru. At the same times, I'm happy too cos dapat jumper boyfriend but yeahhh things getting worse on us. isit me who think much or isit he who take things lightly. Ehhhhhh stop it mira. You told yourself no more sad2 right? (:

So today I've got no plan. But maybe going parkway with family cos dengar2 ibu nk go shopping. haiyakkk. oklahhh. nk bath dulu. i'll be back soon! take care all! me love you!

:DDDDD

2011-04-10T00:51:00.004+08:00

The hardest thing I'll have to do is walk away acting like I don't love you..

I probably shouldn't be telling you this, but no matter what you do to me, i'm still here. for some crazy reason i'll stick around through the bad times & the fights. i'll make up excuses for why you didn't call, why you never cared. i'll keep coming back for more even when you push me away. i think i'm just staying around so that one day when i finally do leave for good, you'll look back & say "wow, that girl really did love me."

I've come to the point where
I'm not going to get upset
&I'm not going to care,
only because everytime I did it
never got me anywhere

When you truly care for someone, you don't look for faults. You don't look for answers. You don't look for mistakes. Instead, you fight the mistakes. You accept the faults and you overlook excuses. The measure of love is when you love without measure. There are rare chances that you'll meet the person you love and who loves you in return. So once you have it, don't ever let go. The chance might never come your way again.

I wish you knew how much this hurts. How every second of every day im holding my stomache and fighting back tears. Just for one day, I wish you could feel how I felt and maybe you'd change your mind.

2011-04-09T06:47:00.003+08:00

I failed to be the girlfriend that you want. Sampai biler nk ginie? I don't know what to do, seriously.

fuck my life. :(

2011-04-08T21:09:00.002+08:00

I miss it when you hug me and said " everything gonna be allright." What's wrong with me this few days. :( I get so fucked over little things he did. I get so sensitive on every little things that he did. I'm easily upset. I easily cried. why why why? :(

Dear you,

I didn't asked for anything much, didn't I? Am I a burden to you? Am I being to over when I'm with you? If yes, I'm sorry. My bad, my faults. I'm sorry if I'm a pain to you. All I asked from you was a little attention from you. I didn't asked for much did I? Each time you meet me, you're tired. you said you're sleepy. You're not feeling well. But why when you're not with me, you can go out, hang out without feeling any tired? Without having any sickness with you? no no. I'm not complaining. don't get me wrong. I'm not saying that everything you did was wrong and I'm right. I'm not malaikat. I'm not champion. You know how hurt am i when you said all that? :(

Doesn't mean I'm quiet, I don't mind what you said, It's just that I don't want to have any more fights with you. Things change. I don't feel like who I used to. What goes wrong? What I did wrong? I tried my best to do what make you happy. I tried but everything I've done seem wrong to your eyes. Why?

You know I hate to have any secrets between us. You know that. But why must there be one?

Things are different now. Way to different now. :( Am i the one who think much or is it you who take things lightly. :(

Dear you,

I miss it when we have one on one talks with each other. I miss the old you. The old us. Please don't force yourself to love me. Leave me if you don't need me. I don't want and I don't need any fake love. Please don't make me hate you cos I know I won't. Please.

2011-04-08T21:08:00.000+08:00

2011-04-06T23:59:00.003+08:00

I had an awesome date with fiqa baby. Two of us only. The rest last minutes cannot la, what la. But who cares? both of us pun we had so much fun! so much laughter. But whole day walking cos my leg to be cramp. :( I got my Pink vans shoes! left with my school beg and alter skirts and im ready for school! Yeah! :D im so tired. so so tired.

But it was fun and i love you so much siti nurfiqah bte abdul ghani! Thanks for listening to all my nonsence. me love you so much! (:

I don't know how much longer can i hold on to this way. God, help me. If not for ibu, I wont be this strong. Thanks ibu for supporting me and all the advices. Insyallah, I'll come with a decision soon. Don't you worry, your little princess is big enough to stand on her own feet. Don't you worry, Your little princess will be patience. Your little princess will fight for all this. I know I'm not alone. Little princess won't cry again if she's were to lose her prince. Little princess will be strong. Little princess still have her dearest queen, which is you ibu. Little princess will take care of herself and won't make you worry. Don't you worry or be sad for me if prince were to leave me cos little princess are used of all this. Don't you blame yourself for trusting prince so much. He's confused. Prince will be better off without his princess. Prince will find someone better than princess for himself. Little princess promise to be strong for you. I love you ibu.

2011-04-04T18:59:00.001+08:00

Did you know that, when u carry Quran, Shaitan gets a headache. When you open it, he collapses. When he sees you reading it he faints. When you are about to forward this message, he will discourage you. So re-blog this.

2011-04-03T02:06:00.001+08:00

2011-04-03T02:05:00.000+08:00

2011-04-02T00:16:00.000+08:00

Hantaran i nak nieee dah cukup! (:

2011-02-28T00:23:00.001+08:00

abah brought me this G SHOCK watchhhhh! awwww! thank you so much abah! can i say that i love you? heee. love you dad! you're awesooommmmeeee! :D

2011-02-21T00:50:00.005+08:00

Hello semuaaaaaaa.

Life have been great. alhamdulilah. been having awesome time spent with dearest girlfriend. I'm just preety excited for school. Me and twin will grab the same beg and shoe. yeahhh! Teringat zaman zaman skolaaaaa secondaryyy school! :D awesomeee seyy! :D :D :D i just cant wait for school reopennnnn!

Me and boyfriend are doing good okay okay laaa. Haisss. He changed. He's not like last timee seyyy. Cos skg he dah pakai alik tindek dier, he like to scold scold me; like testing my patient and all sey. he even dah ader intention to go club. but to think back, im no one. I dun have the right to stop him. I don't want to control him like how i used too. as long his happy with his life, let it be. but is this the real happiness that i want? is this the man i want to be with me? i don't know. allah know the best for me. Insyallah. Guide me to the right wayyyy. Insyallah!

Working was aweeeesoooommmmmeeee tooooo! :D i loving the people there. Oklahhh. I wanna upload my photos! nk clear clear semua all those pictures.

2011-02-20T18:27:00.001+08:00

Im craving for this. any kind soul wanna accompany me grab this pls?

:(((

2011-02-15T02:41:00.002+08:00

Today was really make my day. Its been a long time since I last laugh out loud. Its been a long time since my heart feel really relieveeeed! But I don't know what's with me. I feel something is not right. Like something stopping me which I don't know why.

anyway, i got into higher nitec, bussiness admin. yeah yeah! syukur alhamdulilaah. I got the same course as twin and im praying very hard that we get into the same class. please! that would be awesome! ((: and to my dearest2 friends yg tk dpt, dun give up ok? appeal and yakin mesti ader. dun give up dearest. insyallah dpt. amin.

Anyway, me and boyfriend are fine. Syukur Alhamdulilah. I can't go on my life perfectly without him. I really can't. I never feel this way before. I swear. I never been deeply in love like this before. Not even when Im with wan. I never beg any man to be with me before. except for boyfriend. I just love him too deep and i don't know why. :( Im scared of losing him. really i am. I just wanna be with him for the rest of my life. Only him. Allah, please make our way easier. Please bless our relationship. i btol2 sygkan dier.

I'm glad that me and boyfriend are finally ok. He told me sorry for everything and all. He told me sorry for being ego, stubborn and all. I'm so happy to have my old azroy back. Really am i. I love you too deep sayang.

I promised to change for the better for you. I don't want to lose you no more please baby. I really need you to be with me always and forever. I wanna spent the rest of my life with you. Please ignore what others gonna said please. As long you happy, I'm happy, all those shits doesn't matter anymore to me. All i need is you!

Thanks for the flower dearest baby cinta! Me love you many2 tauuuuu! ((:

2011-02-14T03:09:00.002+08:00

Only allah knows how happy am I to hear your voice again.

Only Allah knows how happy am I to meet you yesterday.

Only Allah knows how happy am I when you said you miss me.

Only Allah knows how sad am I when you wanna pierce back.

Only Allah knows how sad am I when you choose to think what other's think more.

Only Allah knows how sad and hurt am I when you said you calls me name.

Allah knows everything. :(

Ya allah, help me please. I need him. I want only him. I really want him in my life. I'm not strong. :(

2011-02-13T15:21:00.002+08:00

Im gonna give myself some motivation. I cant go on this way. At times, i'm ok. At times, i feel like dying when im think of him. real die ok people. mcm nk bunuh diri terjun. Nasib tau iman aku kuat yg aku tau bunuh diri tuu berdosa besar. lau tk, dah lame aku gooo!

Ikut kan hati, dah lame aku gone. ikotkan hati da lama aku rosakkan diri aku. But think back, buat aper? aku dah keluarga tersayang. aku ader kawan2 tersayang. dieorg sayang aku. dieorg tknk tgk aku ginie. tapi yg rasenye aku sorg. hati aku saket sangat2. but klau aku nanges air mata dari sekali pun, dier tkkn kembali. aku kene kuat. aku kene byk2 istifar. aku kene ingat allah. allah sayang kan aku sebab tuu dier kasi aku ujian demi ujian.

kalau aku boleh luperkan wan, kenapa pulak aku tk boleh luperkan roy? kalau aku boleh move on tanpa wan, kenapa tk roy? come on mira. all u need now is to calm urself down, jgn ingat2 kan dier sgt. buang dier dari otak kau. perlahan2. insyallah boleh.

kau boleh la cumer kau pikir bukan2 sgt. kau pikir dier kesah kau menangis2 utk dier? kau pikir dier sedih tgk kau ginie? tk bodoh! dier happy kt luar dengan kawan2 dier. dier ader kawan2 dier. dier hooray2 kau pulak nk ginie. kental uh mira! come on! you're strong! you got all what u need. you don't lose anything with him. you still yourself and you shall be proud of that. you didn't fall for his sweet words deeper and deeper.

its not that you didn't try to save this relationship. kau dah cube. kau merayu kt dier semua. aperlagi kau nk buat? orang dah tk sudi.

kau ingat dier pena ckp kt kau tk "biler i dgn pompuan, i selalu menang, pasal i nye org ikot sumpah walauapa pun jadi. tk mcm ex2 i. biar sumpah makan dieorg" HAHAHA! LOL la sey tuu semua. too bad azroy, when kau dgn aku, kau kalah dengan sumpah demi allah kau. pasal aku walaupun mcm aner marah dgn kau, aku tk pena ckp 'sumpah demi allah aku nk break dgn kau'. sekarang mcm ner nk ckp? sumpah kau akan makan diri kau. nasiblah, alhamdulillah tat tyme, kau tk pegang quran. nasib aku stop kau.

klau tk, masyallah. Ishhhhk! Aper lahhh aku nie.

as for now, i need to be strong. all this matter of time time and time! ((:

2011-02-11T10:37:00.002+08:00

"Lelaki yg sejati, yg betol2 sayangkan adek tk akan buruk2 kan name adek dekat orang lain walaupun mcm aner besar kesilapan adek" - cousin sis said.

I'm still not over it. I tried and tried but i failed. I just feel its useless living. :(

2011-02-10T15:00:00.000+08:00

Every time you feel like you cannot go on
You feel so lost and
That you're so alone
All you see is night
And darkness all around
You feel so helpless
You can’t see which way to go
Don’t despair n' never loose hope
Cos' Allah is always by your side

Insha Allah x3

Insha Allah you’ll find your way

Insha Allah x3

Every time you commit one more mistake
You feel you can’t repent
And that it's way too late
You’re so confused,
Wrong decisions you have made
Hunt your mind and your heart is full of shame
Don’t despair and never loose hope
Cos' Allah is always by your side

Insha Allah x3

Insha Allah you’ll find your way

Insha Allah x3

Insha Allah you’ll find your way
Turn to Allah
He’s never far away
Put your trust in Him Raise your hands and pray Oh
Ya Allah
Guide my steps don’t let me go astray
You’re the only one that showed me the way,
Showed me the way x2

Insha Allah x3

Insha Allah we’ll find our way

2011-02-10T11:33:00.000+08:00

31.10.2010, 8.03pm

:idk what telah happened to my dear baby nur amirah bte radewan.i noe ure not inb the mood rite now for what happened today. sorry for nt being there 4 u cos my batt low. erm get back to u asap k dear. seriously lau i buat u marah atau tersinggugkan hati u i mintak maaf byk2. i hope after u read this msg i nk tgk u smile cmner u smile pt i everyday. msg ginie je i mampu skg. haish.i cnt do much bt i will try my best to make u happy in anyway. b sorry once again.i nk ckp i rindu u n syg u sgt2. looking foward for tomorrow. cheer up k bby. syg u byk2 k dear!

06.11.2011 , 12.24pm

: dear relax k?kita dah janji each other kite tknk leave each other kan? dh ckp sumpah lagi. kata kita strong. erms let be tgt thru thick n thin k? i tawu u tk mcm pompuan lain. u improve so much kan hunnie. ilysm n i will not stop loving u.kita ikot dgn janji2 kita k b?

06.11.2011 , 1.51pm

:tk. b sumpah demi allah i syg u n tknk berpisah dgn u. i tkt kehilangan u je. mcm ane i serious dgn pompuan nanti dieorg bustard i. b i tawu u tk mcm tu kn?ok lets forget everything n be the normal us. as in be like how we used too b. i sygkan u aje b.

07.11.2010 , 3.26pm

: Ape kate2 ibu tol psl dier tknk tgk anak2 dier cpr dgn bad co. Dia nk tgk anak2 dier bahagia dgn org yg btol. klau anak pompuan i pun i gitu. Dier gitu pasal dier kesah pasal u and ur abg and adek.Mak mana yg tk syg anak n tknk tgk anak2 dier happy. kata2 ibu di dunia ini btol cos they got this strong feelings in them. lau dier rase tk sdap hati tu theres sumting wrong rite. whatever it is, I tetap respect ur mum. I janji tk buat bende2 tuu lagi. Ive change for the better. i tknk generation i ader lobang2 semua. haha.can urh? memang cinta itu buta and dun judge the book by the cover bt tkkan u nk anak2 u jadi jahat kan3?Ok. Im done talking.

08.11.2010 , 1:02am

: cinta. i noe ure asleep now. I want to say sumting. thks for being there for me tru thick n thin. imglad to noe a person like u can endure wif me n be there fpr,e.ure caring that i feel like crying when u gave me ur love. ure sincerity makes me love u more each day. ive been waiting for this moments again. i felt secure being with u. u have promise me not to leave me. be there for me n love me. i have no doubts in u. so me too ive promised what u promise me kn? i noe i punyer promise that time i tk ikot tpi i promise ni i dah ckp sumpah semua n im serious with u. so we have no doubts for each other n we will love each other more each and everyday kan? i noe words can be cheap bt i know myself well cos like i said bola i dah syg i akan uat pape utk syg and tkkn lepaskan u. pls ikot janji k. hehe. i syg u n u srg je. i nk kekal dgn u k cinta. i tknk carik pompuan atau wanita lain tapi i nk carik cinta. cinta is u. u is cinta. have a gf night rest n may u woke up with a smile on ur face. hunnie. i love you so much! mohammad azroy bin ishak syg nur amirah bte radewan.

09.11.2010 , 11.38pm

: I love you

I love you

I sayang you

12.11.2010 , 2.1oam

: syg, im sorry too for today dear. i really love u alot b. cinta i tknk u tinggalkan i tau b. i syg u gila sey. b i love u n i nd u in my life. jgn luh tinggalkan i.

18.11.2010 , 7.02pm

: haish i noe u dissapointed with me. haish. i noe im not gd bf to u. im so sorry b. i dun want to lose u b. smph. b jgn ginie uh b. i mcm nk nanges sey b.

21.11.2010 , 1.54pm

: hope ure ok. hunnie. dgr lagu nie k. tentang perasaanku by irwanshah. utk u tau b.

21.11.2010 , 1.58pm

: b?hunnie?bby?syg?busyuk?bacin? r u ok my dear pwencess?

22.11.2010 , 11.42pm

: hunnie, i wander y im just scared of losing you. i mengaku i sayang you lebih dari ex i yg 1 year 8 month tu.I tk pena rase serious ginie seriously.this is my 1st time that Im serious and confident about it. ive admit it that i hurt u quite alot number of time but my love for u is more that feeling ure hurt. im really happy to be with u. i tdi gitu pasal i takot kehilangan org yg i btol2 syg. nie bkn stmf tapi i did prove to u how much u mean to my life. its like miracle having u by my side. i feel that i must change to much more better person hunnie. Ure past may hurt u but the feelings and memories I had u had with me will lead us to happiness. so im going to hold on ur hand tightly n i wont let go. we may noe each others for a months but the love u had with me is what i didnt expected from a lover like u. so im here to love,care and protect u so that u wont get back to into ure past.Im sorry for behaving weirdly cos thats my attitude hunnie. when im know im wrong, i will change so that i wnt hurt u anymore. i tknk u sakit hati b. U dah cukup kene sakiti oleh org2 yg tk menghargai u and cintakan u. i tau u nmpak i mcm nk nanged coz im really scared of losing u. i may look like a MR nt when In loved im a lover nt a MR. so hope u tc ureself out there k baby. Mohammad azroy ishak syg kamu nur amirah radewan.

22.11.2010, 1.14pm

: hunnie. im sorry abt tdi. i seriously i menyesal. i tk akn buat lagi k. seriously i menyesal. im really really sorry k dear. haish.

23.11.2010v , 10:12pm

:hunnie, nie msg i htr in advance taw. hehe. tkt nanti i nk msg tk sempat. (: hmm. i sungguh bersyukur dpt berkenalan dgn u. psl i tk sangka yg i blh ginie happy. smph tk tipu. im just glad to knw u n b with u. the love, care n trust tat u give me is really unexpected.sorry for those misunderstanding and i perangai and all. i can c how much u love me n etc. i do app it alot. sorry lau i did take things for granted but deep inside me i didn't tend to do that cos i dun wanna hurt u again and again. u kn dah disakiti org bpe byk kali. i dun want history to repeat the same. I want us to be strong. hehe. can urh. U n him may have history but when ure with me we got chemistry. Its means throw away the bad apple and take care of the fresh apple and take care of the new apple cos no use keeping the rotten apple os it will make u hurt by thinking about it. so im here now wif u too guide u to ure happiness. B ilysm seriously cos my love for u is more than i give to my 1yrs 8 ure the 1st girl hunnie.b, ilysm n happy 1 month. love u from the bottom of my heart.ure always in my mind and heart. cinta nur amirah bte radewan, mohammad azroy bin ishak.

25.11.2010 , 9.13pm

: u look sweet wen u read my msg. u look sweeter when u read my msg n smile. u look sweetest when u read my msges, smile and reply. so b the sweetest rite hunnie?

24.12.2010 , 12.01am

: Baby happy 2nd monthsary n att 1 month. I noe we had hard times tgt, fights, arguments n hurt each other feelings.i noe this things is not isnot we want. for me this is just to train how hard both of us handling things. yup its true fail but eversince we fight badly u noe rite when we settle thngs tgt and we didnt let our ego overcome us. i noe ure trying to change n it really meant alot for me. i noe those things wont repeat again cos i believe in us.we shall be positive when facing problemsn dun let ego overcome us.thank for changing. i hope it will stay forever. i noe ive been harsh on u when we at fights. im so sorry and im changing too hunnie. whenever we r mad, dun let ego come over us cos it may lead us to break up n i dunt want n wish that happen to us. Im really happy and secure having u by my side. u didn't faild to make me happy.let us have confidence in our rs.no maybeor whatever i just want us to believe in us. ure everything to me. i will give u everyting n do everything to make u happy wif me. i dun want u to remember abt ure past love n let bygones be bygones. dun ever let ur past makes u thinks i will do the same cos i noe im much different from the past u had k bby. ure someting to me. let us follow our sumpah and janji k syg?i syg u byk2 tau. Hope this msg make u think how much i love u. and how faithful am i to u. like i said im different than ure past. i want to be better thn them n i want the best for u. i want to be the awesome n best bf u had n i want us to stay forever.by thinking positive n have confidence in us. ily nur amirah bte raedwan. 24/10/2010. 24/11/2010

Mohammad azroy bin ishak.

27/12/2010 , 1.44am

:Ok. i tell u honestly. i tknk u sakit hati k. kk. the truth is im sorry for everything. ilytm that im scared if u ould leave me. if i dun love u or my love for u is fading, i wont be with u syg. Ilysm. g tido k honey.ilysm. jgn fikir bkn2 k syg.

11/1/2011 , 9.09pm

: B i aru mandi nk tdo tau. yup. i had a great day with u too. Without u, i wont be this fun right. today fun pasal kite dua. Tc my dear wifey. love u so much. jage diri tkmo gatal2.nyte bby. pape msg b k hun? love u so much.

15.o1.2011 , 7.18pm

: Hello syg! I aru mandi n mkn n bgn! I windu u uh! Windu u tila uh!

15.01.2011 , 11.oopm

: love! love u! love u baby! love u baby love!! love u baby love so much! love u baby love u so much n imy!

16.01.2011, 2.28am

: baby. i tk suker lurh ayang mcm ginie. jgn gine k love. erm.i sumpah demi allah nk hidop n mati dgn u syg. ilysm my dear.

17.01.2011 , 12.17am

: like what i said my dear. leaving u wnt make me happy. having u in my life will make me happy. nyte bby. ily!

17.01.2011 , 5.01pm

: I freaking love miss u so much! ily byk2!

17.01.2011 , 8.14pm

:sorry tdi mandi.. I mmg nk blg benda tpi tkt u sakit hati since u dh ckp ginie i will say. hmm. i wont leave u n ilynimysm! smph tk tipu. erm jgn reply pendek2 agi blh? u dh jelak u ckp. i tk jelak pun ngn u b.

18.01.2011 , 12.16am

:I tkleh tdo sey. unless itell u this. im really happy being with u. i noe its easy to say bt im gonna tell u in details. im happy to have a gf like u n a loving mothers n hardworking dads/I mean our parents. im happy with ur family members n ure happy with mines too. i nk blg u walaupun mcm aner lainnye i, i tk akan tinggal kan u, luperkan u n ada pompuan lain. hati i dah tertutup utk awak. kite setia ok? get it. haha. kk. ilysm. nyte. sweetdream my dear. jgn luper mkn obat. rest well hun.

18.o1.2o11 , 11.17pm

:Haish. i tk tau asl dgn kita but i noe kiter strong kn?kita syg other gile2 kan? last time i repeat i sygkan u gila and takkan akan pergi kt pompuan lain. ure the last. u lau ader laki laki lain, u ckp sal i tau i pena saketkan hati u by uat gitu tapi i tk contact dier. dier msg i. lau u nk balas tu, i tktau uh. yg i tau i sygkan u n nk setia dgn u hingga akhir hayatku. ingat knaper our parents, our grandparents boleh mataer umur kita thn tgt hingga akhir hayat dieorg?their mission is complete and now its our turn. i nk generation kita setia. hjaha. can urh. hmm. sorry lau i byk cranky. i penat n u gtu ngn i sal ckp nk g ngn org lain. its always make me terfikir tkt u tinggalkan i n g pt laki lain. i hope its not true. haish. put this in ur hear my dear princess. I love u n no one can take me away from u! im urs my dear princess! its true im afighter but i fight for my love n tats u.i dnt fight using violence. i fight by my love frm my heart and soul. its u i have now and no one else. trust me, im in love with mr radewan daughter nur amirah. I do love her and need her in my live. without her, my life is incomplete. baby, imy n ily! mr ishak son really scared of losing you n he love u so the very the much. hmm. i tink he miss u badly. he also sorry fopr making u sad. he mean it alot. love u baby!

18.01.2011 , 11.41pm

: Babylove, i nk u igt yg i ini tk mcm laki lain yg u fikir. I did prove to u tat im not like them. I cintakan u aje b. percaya lurhhh. i Nk kita dua bahagia dgn each other. i nanak u sad2.b maaf sal i marah2 pat u. sorry that time u nanges i tk pujuk u. i penat. maaf sgt2. i tau i tk cm dulu. it takes time k hunny. sumpah demi allah i sygkan u n akan uat pape utk kita setia. heeehe. btol. i tk tipu. once i ckp i buat. bluek! hahah! ilysm luh baby! haiyoo. im in love with u luh syg!

18.01.2011 , 11.46pm

:B i nk u igt yg i akan setia ngn u. i tk akan g pt pompuan lain kecuali u. hehe. ure the last woman i wanna be with. i ill be in love with u tau! i setia tau!Lau tk eply means prep8 finish. Pape ily, nyte!

23.01.2011 , 8.40pm

: b thx tau syg make me cool down.anw b batt i ngah 1 bar. erm happy advanced 2 months. i wnt leave u n i do anything for ure happiness my sweetheart!

23.11.2010 , 11.11pm

:Saying ily is easy n it takes a few second to say it. proving to u tat ily is nt easy n it takes time to show it. bt dnt care whatever i take to prove tat ily. im sorry once again if i ever hurt u my dear. it wasnt my intention to hurt u bt i realise my mistake n here i am asking for forgiveness. i now tat im not being fair to u n always blame u. im glas to have u my love.without u, we wnt be this far. thnk u so much for everything. u have done so much for our r/s. i swear to allah that i want to be with u and only u in my life for the rest of my life. i will do anything for u syg. i can afford to lose anything but i cant afford to lose u in my life. m love is like the sand which is countless. sumpah demi allah i sygkan u n nk setia dgn u nur amirah bte radewan. Happy 2nd months tgt n 3rd months knowing each other. mohammad azroy bin ishak. 241010,241110

23.11.2011 , 11.48pm

:Like i say i wont leave u my dear. i ikt janji2 i. i terlalu sygkan u b.

24.01.2011 , 12.02pm

: bcos ily! ure worth loving!

25.01.2011 , 2.05pm

: tgk lurhhh.b i nk u jdimcm dulu lub. ilysm. jgn mcm ginie

25.o1.2011 , 8.14pm

: bumbum.. sorry lau i ada uat u mrh ke sakit hati k nari. sowie love u my dear.

26.01.2011 , 12.05pm

: Asl? dun like thatt lurh syg. senyum?toleh luh? ibu kepada aiman n alya kan?smile?

*k! this make me sad. :(( .*

30.01.2011 , 7.18am

:K. u should knw this. i wont leave u and nvr will. its either u change or lose me. bye. ilysm! roymirah<3

30.01.2011 , 8.04am

: sleep well. im born to not having a gd life. i was expecting u to be the magis in life to brighten up my day. i didn't expect u to be u to do this. haish. pt umah lak ader prob. haish. tc tgh sejuk. pkai jacket tdo. bye nyte.

30.01.2011 , 9.16pm

: u love me or u lose me?

u change or u want me?

u want me or u dnt want me?

30.01.2011 , 9.22pm

: matikan ? u masih hidopkan? :( kn dosa bunuh org. u pun smph tknk tglkan b. :(

02.02.2011 , 1.26am

: i syg u! like duh! hehee. tapi i tkot kehilangan u je.

02.02.2011 , 4.52am

: senang punya bbl eh! i straight foward eh pat u! u nk marah ke aper ke sedih ke ure pasal. i nk ckp i smph demi allah sygkan b.

03.02.2011 , 5.29pm

: asl defensive sgt? ader hide benda kan tuu pasal gitu. selama nie i ngan u gine u uat pt i. 1st msg jantan lain beh skg aper lak. ginie u ckp u syg i? i smpah demii allah b sygkan u tpi b gitu pasal b tkot kehilangan u.

04.02.2011 , 12.40am

: i nk break. nyte. tc. sweet dream. sorry.

04.02.2011 , 12.42am

: anw thx 4 everything n our memories tgt. app it alot.

04.02.2011 , 12.47am

: sumpah demi allah i nk break.

You know what, after all, after reading all this, i just think all his words are sweet honey sugar strawberry talks. And I'm so stupid to fall for it over and over again. Haisss. It's hard to move on but the best way to mend a broken heart is family, girlfriends and time.

2011-02-10T04:32:00.011+08:00

2011-02-07T01:34:00.004+08:00

If you people were to asked me how I'm doing now, Im happy to say that Im not crying again. Dah 6 jam tau tk cry. Lau tk sikit mira cry. tk sampai 1 jam nanges. Eeee. Kental kan. Mira happy sangat ader siblings mcm abg and adek. Sumpah lau tk pasal dieorg, mira tk bole strong seyy. Tgk abg nye post nieee. I know he referring to me. He comfort me all the way. Macam2 kata. Macam2 story. I sayang you both so much tau! ((:

Not forgetting my girlfriends yg text me non stop, otp with me when i cried and all. and cousin, who came down to meet me and text and chat with me. I really app it that. without u people, i swear im still crying. Im not feeling sad too now. I came to realise that everyone make mistake and we must not repeat the mistake to our future too. Org dah tk sudi, i cant do anything much.

Macam mane mira merayu semua, mira tebalkan muker semua, it wont bring anything.

As for now, i wont want to hope any much. no more hope. me n roy masih kawan n we dah talks things out. kiter tetap kwn. Pasal jodoh kiter, serahkan ajer pade allah. Insyallah. Lau he btol2 utk mira, dier memang utk mira. Mira da tknk nanges lagiii2. Dah tknk fikir2 semua.

Mira actually tgh type semua msg2 yg roy pena antar mira pt blog. when mira bacer alik semua,eeee,mcm sweetalker sia dier. But tak baik mira kater gitu! He's the best I ever had.

Heeheee. dier tetap sweet. nanti korg read ajer la. Now mira save kt draft.

Mata dah layu nie. Da dua malam mira tk tdo btol sey. Nari satu ari mira tk makan langsong. Heeheee. assalamuailaikum and camat malam!

((:

2011-02-05T01:42:00.007+08:00

I can't go to bed. He just called me but I didn't answer. I'm too hurt. very very hurt with his actions. Yes I knew that I hurt him. Alot of time. Countless. But come on, in relationship, no one is perfect. I aint perfect. I try my best to love you. I gave you all my love. Feelings fade isn't what I expected from you.

Now what I feel is regret. Why shall I love you in the first place? Why shall I let myself to suffer another heartache after wan? why? Didnt i try to be the best for you? why you doing this to me. why? why only now? when my heart is really in love with you. I really regret in loving you! Oh my, Im such a fool. It's better to stay in heartbreak position that I had with wan than suffering another heartbreak with him.

Yes. I knew what I did was wrong. My mistake for replying to lan's text. If some of you knew, lan is my ex. But excuse me, just a text and you making a big fuss? as if I hurt you too deep. Have you forget what you did to me when we had a fight during december? You yourself reply to her text. You otp with her. You even meet her. How did I found out? I found it out by myself. If i didnt accidently call eddy using your phone I wont able to find out. I was angry. But did I gave you chance? I did. I tell myself its ok. Everyone make mistake. Didn't I gave you the chance to change?

After three days, I found out that you didnt only otp and text her but you went to meet her. How did I found out? I wanted to bluetooth song from your phones to mine. I asked who bluetooth devices it is. You didn't want to admit that hers. You claim its ur cousin. You even swore to me. What am I? A fool or something? I keep quiet the whole day and finally you admit. Mind you, I'm your girlfriend and you meeting other girl behind my back. Be it she's someone you have close before. It's before. I was angry. But did I gave you chance? I did. I tell myself its ok. Everyone make mistake. Didn't I gave you the chance to change?

Each time we fought, you will add some ladies to your facebook. But did I took any revenge back to you? No. I didn't. i did not accept any friends request at facebook from guys. I decline 100 over friends request cos I don't want you to feel jealous or something. I want you to believe me. Still, each time we fought, you will add ladies. I was angry. But did I gave you chance? I did. I tell myself its ok. Everyone make mistake. Didn't I gave you the chance to change?

Now, I made a mistake by replying to lan's text and you can't accept it.Just a reply of 'K' and you're behaving like this. At workplace, I didn't talk to lan at all. Even If i have to talk to him, I asked someone to be my postman. Cos why, I promise not to interact with any guys cos of you. But have you ever think that? No. You even when to the extend to push me hard during the fights we had. You even left me walking alone in the dark, raining to the chalet terrace as you're damn mad with me. You rejected my call. You didn't reply to my text and all. I went to the extend to beg you. But did you have any sympathy on me? No. You didn't. But when everything is fine, I thought you forgive me already. But you didn't. Each time we fought, you will bring back the matter. Am I a doll or something who is feeling-less, heartless where you can scold, shout me anyhow you want. When you realize your mistake, all you did know what to say is sorry. I was angry. But did I gave you chance? I did. I tell myself its ok. Everyone make mistake. Didn't I gave you the chance to change?

That day, on Thursday, you fetched me from my workplace. Just because I didn't want to walk pass Mad Jack, you accused me anyhow. You accused on me having scandal with someone at my workplace. Am I a player all this while? All this while I'm being faithful for nothing? You shout at me at the public. You pulled and grab my hand harshly. Am I a doll who can't feel any pain? It's damn painful mind you. I control my tears. But you didn't care. You even accused me more and more. I was angry and I shouted back. You left me alone. Crying by myself with people around me watching.

I meet u at your place as I wanted my laptop back. You talk to me. Fine. My faults. I can't control my anger. I pushed you hardly. I was damn angry with your attitude. All what you did harshly to me came flash back to my mind and thats the reason why I pushed you. You were unsatisfied with me and you pushed me back too. Mind you, How can you compare a lady energy with a man energy. I almost fall back down when you pushed me. But I managed to control myself from falling down. I shouted at you. I ran away.

You gave me a chase and I thought everything is fine. I thought we managed to settle things out.

was angry. But did I gave you chance? I did. I tell myself its ok. Everyone make mistake. Didn't I gave you the chance to change?

But I was wrong. You asked for timeout and now you asked for breakup.

If I can forgive you, why can't you? If I can, without failed to forgive you eventhough its hard, why can't you? If I can always accepted for who you are, why can't you?

Why? No other man in my previous relationship have act harshly towards me. No man have ever pushed me. No. I'm not comparing. I always thought you're the best for me. I always thought you're the man I wanted to bring with me to the future. Remember our Aiman and Aliya? All that shit we have plans? Why only now all this happening? Just because of one mistakes I did?

I thought you will stick to me no matter what happened. I thought you are the one who can endure everything with me. sumpah u semua pergi maner? :( sumpah u semua tk boleh pkai. :( You know what hurt me the most? when I ingat2 kan semua sumpah dier. WHYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYY!!!!!!!!!!!!!

sumpah dier berbakul bakul. haiiiiiisssssssssss! :((

eeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeee! I'M SO STRESSS! FUCK MY LIFE! I HATE YOU SO MUCH! I REALLY HATE YOU SO MUCH! I HOPE YOU'LL BE READING THIS! I HATE YOU SO MUCH! SO SO MUCH!

Dear me, stop crying will you? It's time to forget everything and look foward. Remember how you managed to get over wan? Remember how you managed to stand all alone. Remember how you need no man in life. True. You are too dependable on him. But wake up, he bustard you. He throw you away. He don't need you. He can't accept your mistake. He can't be wth someone like you. Why the hell are you still crying for him? He's out there having fun and you're here crying. Bullshit. Just keep get up when it knock you down. Insyallah.

Pray for me people. Insyallah. Thanks for everything mohammad azroy bin ishak. I love you and I always do. :(

2011-02-05T01:21:00.003+08:00

the reason is his love for me have fade. that's the reason.He didn't have the courage to tell me that. I got to know from someone close.

I can't think of anything. All I want to do is to cry! and cry. and cry. :(((((((

2011-02-04T17:34:00.002+08:00

Our love didnt last. Its a sad things. But I had enough of crying and crying over a spilt milk.

He asked for it yesterday night. He even swore upon the name of allah. Maybe its time for me to let go of everything and be single again. Well, I've already suffered hows the feeling of heartbreaking is. all this is matter of time. Guys will be guys. Kata Kata manis.

Jodoh kita dua sampai di sini aje. :/ I'm trying to smile eventhough its hard.

I'll be fine.

Thanks you so much dearest friends for all your concern and care. I really appriciate it alot. those long messages/longcall with u guys really gave me the strength. Thank you. I love you people.

2011-02-04T00:12:00.004+08:00

I miss my boyfriend. :( Me and boyfriend are on time off till sunday. Boyfriend asked for it. :( We had a big fight. Damn big fight. Fuck shit. The cause of our fight are stupid. Idiot. I hate it. :( He even grab my hand tightly. It's damn pain. He even push me damn hard. I hate it! He's changing.

I thought after settling it, we'll be fine. After all those tears, we'll be fine. But I was wrong. It seem to affect boyfriend so much till he asked for timeout. What shal i do?

Boyfriend, where on earth are the old mohammad azroy? I miss the old you. Please don't change. Me need you. Why are you doing this to me? Don't you love me anymore?

:(((

2011-02-03T23:40:00.002+08:00

Some of the photos that are taken during lepak with Fiza baby and boyfriend on . Me loveee! ((:

25th Jan.

Boyfriend budak baik tau dengar kata when i nk pkai kan dier lipstick. ((:

Tadaaaaaaaaa! Here's the outcome! ((: Cantik kan boyf saya! ((:
i likeeeeeeeeee! yummmm! Hahaha! ((:

2011-01-31T13:59:00.004+08:00

Assalamuailaikum diary! (:

I had an awesome weekends. With abah's family chalet. :D Boyfriend came down with riez, ikram and friends. Had an awesome time with boyfriend. Boyfriend malu2. menyampah siol. At last, ibu yg jempot boyfriend. ((: Overnight there but ibu and abah went home at 3 in the morning. So i talk with amin all the way cos boyfriend played soccer with riez. Nana waiting for time to dance. HAHAHAHA! and after that, boyfriend ajak me jalan2 around the pasir ris beach. ((:
we walked around the stepping stone. Boyfriend cakap its good for leg. haha! And we slacked around. Plan to watch sunrise with boyfriend but tk jadi due to some reasons.
Balik chalet around 5 plus. Boyfriend and riez played the monopoly millionaire game. So funny you know! ((: Heeeheee. End up riez kalah. Boooo! :)

After that, something unexpected happened that caused boyfriend to go home. Me and boyfriend had some fights. Boyfriend caught my message with lan. :( And that caused him to be real mad. Tk pena i dengan dier nmpak dier gitu marah. Macam kene rasuk. :( He even pushed me away. Shouted at me. and left me alone. Tknk dgr aper mira nk ckp. i chased dier semua but dier buat bodoh. Unfair tau dier. Biler part dier, mira tk gitu tau. Walaupun I marah, i dengar explaination dier. Nie I setakat msg jer tau. Dier siap jumper lagi taau. Unfair kan?

He left me walking alone tau. Left me crying alone in the dark. sedih kan? I called nana and she and ikram slacking around the swimming pool there. So joined them. Thanks nana and ikram. These two lovelies are so sweet. stay strong tau nana! ((:

After that, send ikram and friends home at downtown. We main hujan. Best gilerrr oiii! ((: I and nana had a long talk. Reach chalet, wash up and text boyfriend. He perangai with me all the way. I was too tired but i cant sleep at all. But managed to sleep for like around 4 hours with nana? Woke up and we play around. Bathed at the swimming pool with beloved cousin was awesomeee to the max! Played monkey ball and all. The slide was so awesomeeeeee! ((:

So around 7 plus, we washed up and get ready to go home. I had an awesome time with beloved family! me lurb u all many2! ((: and now i cant wait for CNY with ibu side pulakkk! weeeeee! ((:

Anyway, i and boyfriend dah okkkkkk. weeeeeeeee! I likeeee so much. Macam after what happened, i swear i still love him and only him ok! (:

2011-01-28T14:01:00.004+08:00

Assalamuailakum semua! ((:

I got nothing to do now. Waiting for time to get ready to go work at 5pm. I'm damn lazy to drag my ass to work. I don't know why. But before that will be accompanying adek teha to get some stuff for tomorrow chalet. Yeah yeah! Besok ader chalet sebelah mira nye bpk nye side. Best oiii chalet dier. I likeeee! beh next week lak kan ader bbq pit sebelah ibu lak. I can't simply wait! (:

I miss my boy so much! :( Last we met was on tues? On tuesday meet him and lepak with fiza bby. Boyfriend, you own me the pictures tau! I miss my boy so muchhh! He was so sweet yesterday. Around 1 plus in the morning, I had some fights with abah. :( I don't know why abah keep finding faults with me. Each time he mad at me, he will panggil mira bodoh semua. Its hurt me alot. Just for some little things I did wrong, he scolded me like I made the biggest mistakes. After those lectures from him, I cry to myself. I cried out loud alone. And I texted boyfriend eventhough I knew that he asleep. Told him that I hate abah so much. And on the spot he called me with his sleepy voice.
Upon hearing me crying, he was shocked. Sweet sey u b. He try to calm me down but I can't as I'm too hurt with abah's word. So he asked me to cry first and I did. While I was crying, all he did was to listen. He didn't interupt. Only when I started to calm down, he asked me what happened and all. told him everyting and he advice me to be patient and all. I sayang boyfriend saya many2! (: And when i cry again, he listen. You see, it reminds me of wan. not that I miss wan. I can see the different between wan and boyfriend.
I remember I used to cry loud when abah scolded me and I called wan. All he did was to scold me because at the same time when I'm crying I vent my anger to him. I did vent my anger to boyfriend too yesterday but all he did asked me to calm down.

Boyfriend, if only you knew how much I love you. How much i need you with me every now and then. How i wish we won't have any fights and arguments. How I wish you knew how scared am I to lose you baby. I love you and only you! ((:

So yeah, I went to the doctor yesterday. Mira syukur alhamdulilah sey! It's urine infection! ((: Alhamdullialh. Thanks allah! (: But Im still scared as after taking those medicine, there's still blood at my vagina. Aiyooo. :( But tgklah dua tiga hari nanti. Lau tk baek jugak, kene go doc. Insyallah lah tkder pape. (:

Yesterday I got to meet my dearest fiza and eyfa baby after so long! They slack at my place till night. Cook for them nasi goreng mushroom and pasta goreng. Thank eyfa for helping me cut all the ingredients. I had so much fun with them. please meet up soon my dearest girls. Me missing you all already! ((:

I miss my 5 girlfriends too! Meet up soon my dearest! I can't wait for school reopen too! Cos sab will be schooling at ite simei too0! Accounting. Hahaha! Lynee pergi, kau dtg. weeeee!

Till here people.
assalamuailaikum! (:

2011-01-27T12:06:00.002+08:00

You're being unfair! Tk fair sungguh! Benci ahhh! Geram ahhh! Bingit giler! Asl la lelaki semua perangai mcm giniee! eeeeeeeeeeeeeeeee! Geramnyeeee! Cube kalau aku accept lelaki, mesti kau mengamok kan? Even lelaki yg lelaki aku kenal kau akan mengamok kan? Tk kirelah, kawan aku nye mataer ke aper ke. Kau merepek nk mampos la! beh kau tuuu?! Accept kawan kau nye mataer boleh uh! Best per kene ginie. Biler aku tanyer jer, kau ckp aku karot? Aku karot? Beh kau. ehh ader pergi, ader balik la. Kalau kau nk ginie mcm, jgn hairan la kalau satu ari aku pun gitu. Kau tau aku nye org mcm aner. Aku tk main la balas2 nie semua. Cumer biler aku geram kene tuduh, kene marah tk tentu pasal! Aku dah cukup sabar lah!

And bangun teros facebook. wuho0! I like. cube kalau aku? confirm kau perangai satu hari la sey! aku kat sini call aku mcm nk mampos, msg kau, tunggu kau nye call semua, tup tup, kau kt facebook. baekk uh mohammad azroy bin ishak! WELL DONE! excellent! (: BINGITT AHHH!

2011-01-27T11:36:00.002+08:00

Assalamualaikum diary.
I'm currently updating using abang's computer. punyee slow uhh. Stress dong.

Mira dah start kejer Mad Jack. Kejer dier senang giler nk mampos sey! (: I likeeeee. Yg best nye boleh pkai aper2 baju hitam. Mira pun kadang2 pkai cargo pants. Seluar aper2 pun boleh aslkan hitam. kasut any color and any types or design. gerek kan. Dah tuu Dekat pun dengan rumah. 10 minutes ajer perjalanan alik. (: Cumer i belom dapat biasekan kejer situ la. Kadang2 I rindu pizza hut. Yelahh i kt pizza hut dah lamer. tapi insyallah, lame2 mira dapat sesuaikan lahh kt Mad Jack. (:

Me and boyfriend are doing great allahdulilah. But at time, boyfriend i tuu boleh jadi the meanest boyfriend I ever had and at time dier bole jadi the sweetest boyfriend I ever had. Kadang2 I bole benci dier giler babi and kadang2 I boleh sayang dier giler babi! Boyfriend sweet tau. biler i saket, dier tk abes2 cheer me up. mira pulak tk abes2 marah dier. I dun know what got into me. Maybe I'm so stress thinking about myself.

Anyway, I'm feeling very very down this few days. Its cos mira dari monday asyik kencing darah. And Mira btol2 takot. :( I'm really very scared. Am i dying soon? I don't know what the causes of it. Actually mira bkn kencing darah, setiap kali lepas mira kencing and mira lap ader darah.

Jangan pikir bukan2. I never do anything with boyfriend. Me and boyfriend are having a 'clean' relationship and I know my limit with him. Ibu cakap mira byk stress agaknye. Kawan2 lain ckp maybe pasal mira nye tuu panas. ader ckp kurang air. ader ckp takot cancer. mira takotttttttttttt! :( Ya allah! I don't know why. And today mira going doctor. I hate it when I'm sick. I hate it susah kan ibu. Kecian tau ibu. Dari last 2 week asyik risau pasal mira. I don't have mood to go anywhere. Everytime I'm feeling down, I told myself to cheer up. I told myself it's nothing. but at the same time, I can't help but to be scared too. :( Doa2 kan mira tkder pape kay darling? Insyallah. (:

Oklahh love. I'll be back for more. Pray for me! Insyallah!
Assalamuailaikum. (:

2011-01-25T15:16:00.003+08:00

2011-01-25T15:16:00.001+08:00

2011-01-25T15:15:00.002+08:00

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2011-01-25T15:14:00.002+08:00

2011-01-25T15:14:00.001+08:00

2011-01-25T15:13:00.002+08:00

2011-01-25T15:13:00.001+08:00

2011-01-25T15:10:00.000+08:00

2011-01-25T15:08:00.000+08:00

2011-01-25T15:07:00.000+08:00

2011-01-25T14:53:00.001+08:00

kau cinta pertamaku
kau cinta terakhirku
tiada apa yang bisa ku nafikan kasih kita
kau air dimataku

satu antara seribu
tiada antara di dunia
mungkinkan terputus di tengah jalan
mungkinkan terlerai tanpa ikatan
usah ragu dengan takdir

kau air dimataku
satu antara seribu
tiada antara di dunia
mungkinkan terputus di tengah jalan
mungkinkan terlerai tanpa ikatan
usah ragu dengan takdir

mungkin kitakan berbeza haluan
berakhirnya cerita percintaan
segalanya ketentuan tuhan

mungkinkan terputus di tengah jalan
mungkinkan terlerai tanpa ikatan
usah ragu dengan takdir
mungkin kitakan berbeza haluan
berakhirnya cerita percintaan
segalanya...2x

mungkinkan terputus di tengah jalan
mungkinkan terlerai tanpa ikatan
usah ragu dengan takdir
mungkin kitakan berbeza haluan
berakhirnya cerita percintaan
segalanya ketentuan tuhan

segalanya ketentuan tuhan....

2011-01-25T14:38:00.001+08:00

Inilah aku apa adanya

Yang ingin membuatmu bahagia

Maafkan bila ku tak sempurna

Sesempurna cintaku padamu

Ini cintaku apa adanya

Yang ingin selalu di sampingmu

Ku tahu semua tiada yg sempurna

Di bawah kolong langit ini

Jalan kita masih panjang

Ku ingin kau selalu disini

Biar cinta kita tumbuh harum mewangi

Dan dunia menjadi saksinya

Untuk apa kita membuang-buang waktu

Dengan kata kata perpisahan

Demi cinta kita aku akan menjaga

Cinta kita yg telah kita bina

Walau hari terus berganti hari lagi

Cinta kita abadi selamanya

Jalan kita masih panjang

Ku ingin kau selalu disini

Biar cinta kita tumbuh harum mewangi

Dan dunia menjadi saksinya

Untuk apa kita membuang-buang waktu

Dengan kata kata perpisahan

Demi cinta kita aku akan menjaga

Cinta kita yg telah kita bina

Walau hari terus berganti hari lagi

Cinta kita abadi selamanya

2011-01-25T13:53:00.002+08:00

Bingit uh. Ape mira buat semua salah. I don't understand boyfriend uh. this few day perangai mcm tooooooooooooooooooot uh. ingat aku tkder perasaan?! Bingittt uhhh. Kesabaran aku pun ader tahap laaaa. Memang betol la bukan salah kau sorg. Salah aku jugak. But come on laaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaa!

EEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEE! YAKDUSH!

2011-01-25T00:21:00.003+08:00

Dear Diary,

I had an aweome fosome day with boypriend♥ i! But mula2 sedih la pasal kiter gaduh. Tapi i dun give a fucking care. Pasal i tau mcm aner mira gaduh dgn boypriend♥, kiter mesti confirm okayy alik nye. And true enough, But mira sedih laaa cos kiter nye 2nd monthsary boypriend♥ mintak break tauuu. daaa dua kali. He was damn mad with my kata2. but boyf♥ menyesal dgn kate2 dier. I didn't pick up his call, reply to his text and all. And tup tup, dier dah kat depan rumah mira. I belom lagi semua. Heeeheee. I mula2 marah la but kecian kan dier nye pasal. After bath, I invite him to my house. And boypriend♥ bawak my fav kinder bueno! ((: Shayang boypriend♥ saya many2!

I ajak boypriend♥ makan but dier segan pasal abang ader. lol. After eating, spent time with him. Awwww! took alot of webcam pictures with him. And I happy sekali! Boyf♥ never failed to make me feel so grateful. Am really grateful to have him in my life. pastu boyf♥ nk view i nye blog. heeehee. Mula2 i tk kasi. Pastu when i majok dgn dier over something, I baring kt lagi satu nye sofa la. dier senyap2 tau view. Hahaha.

I tk paham la dengan boyf♥. Dier marah tau setiap kali nmpak/bacer/ingat pasal sape2 kt past i. I mean like, lelaki2 yg i knal tuu semua i nye past. Nk jealous buat aper? Mcm la dier tkder past. Past dier lagi terok. I tk ckp pape pun. I tk panggil ex2 dier dgn name2 yg terok. Cumer dektuu emotional semacam nahh. But I know, boyfriend♥ jealous pasal dier shayang i! ((: Cumer jealous tk bertempat. Lol kan.

My dear boyfriend♥ yg masham♥, bacin♥, irritating♥ and yg paling i shayang♥ sekali,

Thank for accepting me for who am I, with or without makeup, how messy, irritating I can be. Staying with me no matter how hard it is to be with me. For loving me each day without failed. I love you and only you!♥ ((:

2011-01-24T00:13:00.002+08:00

I nak wish boyfriend I happy 2nd monthsary and happy 3rd of knowing each other!

And yeah, Orang Mad Jack tadi call cakap I can start work besok kt situ. Pukul 5 sampai close.

Baru ingat nk duduk rumah diam but since rezeki dah masok, tknk tolak laaa. Dah dua kejer dtg i tolak. lagipun nie dekat. (:

2011-01-23T11:51:00.000+08:00

ok. this is funnnneeeyyy! haha!

2011-01-22T18:34:00.002+08:00

hiiiiiiii semua! I'm bored. Freaking bored till I don't know what to do. I'm not working. I'm at home shake leg all the way. Ibu and abah at home watching teevee. Teha and abg went out and I'm bored like hell.

Boyfriend sleeepinggg likeee a piggggg. :( No one want to entertain me and I'm entertaining myself. :(

Hahahaha! Loser sia me. Sedihh2. So i decided to do some make up on myself. Asl boleh nyeee lahhh. Hahaha! (: Just to make myself happy and keep myself away from boredneeeesssss uhh.

kbye. I lapar lahhh. xD

Assalamuailaikum.

2011-01-22T02:10:00.003+08:00

Halo halo! (:

I'm back. Just put down the phone with boyfriend and am waiting for him to call back. (: Nak otp sampai pagiii. Weeeee! Well, I had an awesome day today. I mean on friday cos nari dah saturday. Great day spent with beloved boyf and family.

Meet boyf at tamp at 12plus. Went to have our breakfast cum lunch together at LJS. I was shy when I met him. Plus nervous which I don't know why. Haha. Maybe pasal dah lame tk jumper.

After lunch, we walk around tampines to kill time. And we decided to head to hougang as we were bored. Reached hougang and chill here and there. Around 3 plus, adek call me saying she's hungry and all. Pity her so meet her kt rumah with boyfriend. Change clothes and off we went to nex mall. boyf was so jakoooonn to see nex mall. cute la boy i niee. We ate at LJS again. heee. Had lots of laughter with them. Walk around the skypark all. After that, Boyf sent me home and he off home.

Reach home and bath. Online and ibu came to my room and told me that abah wanna go out for dinner since ibu didn't cook dinner. So yeah, wait for abah to end work and off we went to chai chee restaurant. Had our normal feast which is beancurd hotplate, lemon chicken, fried rice, baby squid, mixed veg and baby squid. So yummy.

After that we off to giant walaupun waktu dahh menunjukkan pukul 10.15pm cos abah wanna buy some fruits. Haha. So yeah, sementara tunggu abah bayar the bill, I play around with abang's bike. Fuyooo! Gerek nk mam oii. I simply can't wait for 24th august! nk vrroooom vrrooomm. Nanti kor semua nmpak mira on the road ok? ((: Berangan lebih la aku nie. Duet masih blum bole save2. Lol.

So dalam kereta, I had much laughter with beloved family. Dahhh lame oii tk have fun mcm ginie dengan family.

Let me share some funny moments i had with them. When I shared it with abang, dier setakat, HAHA aje. mcm toot kan. Hahaha. You see, to me every slightest things is funny! LOL.

while going to giant, kiter buka radio siaran ria la. then ader kluar lagu cinta kita, and ibu buka la kuat2.

Abah: ape lah ibu nie. Msg lagu nie. Nie dgr pun nk buka2 kuat. Lagu " Thanks to allah for my love apelah"

Me: huh? Abah bukan lahh tu lagu maher zain for the rest of my allah. Nie cinta kita. Lain lah.

Ibu and teha dah kekek. abah nk cover line ckp, "eh lain eh? Same ajeee"HAHA!

And this are the photo taken during safuan's birthday. (: Was an awesome day spent with the beloved people around me. Thank to the couple that my beloved boyfriend came down. I was actually frustrated with him tauu cos he went to school instead of coming to safuan's birthday. And he also told me he will be not coming down despite how I beg him. Turn out dier dtg pasal dier ckp nak bagi suprised. happy giler oiii!

Play alot of games with themm. fun giler oii. And now, I missing them. jom kuar yok! I wanna go swimming. tk pun kiter go zoo nk? Meet our friends there. ahli keluarga kiter yg kt sane dah rindu kiter oiii! hahha!

klah kengkawan. gtg. nk otp dgn shayang saya!

Selamat malam. AssalamuailaikuM! (:

2011-01-21T20:34:00.002+08:00

Hi. I miss my boyfriend walaupun kiter baru jumper one hour ago. :(

tapi i had much fun dengan boyfriend. Satu minggu satu hari dong ngak jumper baru ini kami ketemu dong. Apeee dieerr? Hahaha.

Actually I'm just killing my time by updating you dear diary. Waiting for ibu abah to siap and we going dinnerrrrr. Nanti malam saya update awak lagi yer shayang? (:

2011-01-19T20:23:00.002+08:00

When I think back, I don't think I can bring you with me, to the future.

2011-01-18T13:44:00.003+08:00

Assalamuailaikum ((:

Dahh lamer ehh tk proper update. Well, Mira saket lagiii. :( This past few week asyik saket ajer tau. :( On sunday night cum morning at 2.30am gituu, Mira nye perot saket giler. Went to 24hours doctor dekat hougang with ibu and abah. Sumpah touch giler dgn dieorg. I thought abah won't care but I was wrong. Ibu yg paling risau. Ibu sampai berak2 and menggigil pasal takot tgk mira gituu. Cutee kan? (: And doctor suspect mira ader appendiks. Haiyoo. But alhamdulillah dah tk saket2 lagi. Satu malam mira tk bole tdo. Ibu and adek smpai tk go skola and work pasal nk jage mira. Fiza bestfy also come and visit me. Thank dearest. ((:

Dahh tuu tk stop situ tau, Smalam malam, on the monday night cum tuesday morning, I can't went to bed at all! Mira nye backbone on the left side pulak saket giler. I didn't wanna wake ibu up cos I don't want to disturb her. Ibu on sunday malam tk tdo langsung pasal mira. i don't wanna trouble her. and adek teha yg urut kan mira. Message mira and pujuk mira when I cry. The pain, ya allah, only allah know how I feel. :( I wanted to call boyfriend but he was asleep and somemore besok dier skola pagi. So teha had no choice since she don't know what to do, she woke ibu up and ibu message me. Makin melalak la mira cos I was touched with ibu reaction and with the pain I had to bear with. Dahh tiga pagi tau tuu.

Bestnye lau saket kan, dapat tidor dengan ibu kt bilik ibu. atas katil lagi. (: But I can't move alot. Adoiii. Saketnye. Allah saje tauuu. But i feel better lah now. cume sengal2 ajeee.. Currently alone at home. Abang went out, Teha skola, ibu and abah kejer. Kecian tau ibu. Dah la tk tdo satu malam, kejer pulak tuu. Pengorbanan ibu tk mungkin dapat mira balas.

So supposedly, mira start kejer tau nari kt MFM dengan durrah but mira tk gooo. Pasal I'm sick and some more, I got a job offered at Mad jack at Nex Mall. Siapa nk tolak kan? dah laa, dekat dgn rumah lagiii. Dier nye pay pun urmmm! Heeeehee. Next week start. So this week, besok, fri and sat mira kejer kt pizza hut. Tapi tgklah lau besok bole keje tk lau mira dah feel better.

I miss my shayang♥ sangat2 tauuu! Rinduu dier hanya tuhan saje tauu. Last mira jumper dier on thursday. tk pena sey kiter tk jumper gini lame. 5 days. behh kan sejak mira start2 saker2 mira perangai ajee dengan roy♥. Hmmm. On sunday, dier sweet giler tau. Dier tauu mira asyik pkai jacket adidas yg wan bagi. He dislike me wearing it. Dah tuu, He wanted to lent my posb card as his papa wanna transfer him some $ but I will be out with my family. So i left my card with the adidas perfume I brought him outside my house. At the electrical door. And after boyfriend♥took it, boyfriend♥ sms me saying that once I reached home, check the electrical place. Tk suspect pape lah cos I thought boyfriend♥ brought me kinder bueno ker aper la. Pasal tuu selalu suprise dier bagi. So when I reached home, 1st thing, I check it and boyfriend♥ left me his red jacket. Awwww♥!

Mira asked la why dier bagi mira jacket dier. Answer dier cute tau, boyfriend♥ told me that I can throw away the jacket wan gave me and beside that when Im wearing his jacket, I will feel he near me and hugging me. Heeehee. I sayang boyfriend♥ I sangat2. But I won't throw wan jacket laaa. Tuu pun kenangan sey. Hmmm.

I'm planning to get myself a new phone la. Handphone yg mira pkai tuu handphone abah. Mira macam nak pkai iphone. Macam best tgk org pakai iphone sey. But sayang sey nk tukar, Pasal handphone tuu banyak kenangan message mira n boyfriend♥. ahhhh. tkper. Since mira byk free time kan, I'll transfer all those message here. at my blog. heeee. Biase lah can buat kenangan.

Oklahhh. till here. Mira nye pinggang dah start saket2 alik. :( ibuuu cepatlahh alik. adek teha dahh alik. (:

I'll be back for more okee people? (:

2011-01-17T22:40:00.000+08:00

love her pale make up and hair. ((:

2011-01-16T00:52:00.001+08:00

Sometimes I miss the old days,

the old YOU,

the old US.

2011-01-15T00:51:00.000+08:00

dengan yg nieeee jugakkk! bestnyeee! ((:

2011-01-15T00:50:00.000+08:00

I NAK NIEEEEEEEEEE!

2011-01-11T22:04:00.002+08:00

Assalamuaialaikum diary!

I'mmmaaa happpiiiieeeessstttt lady today tauuuuu! Cos why? Cos I got to meet dearest babycinta after 2 freaking days I didn't meet him! Hahaha. Baru setakat dua hari. but sumpah i miss him rabak to the maxx ahh abeh!

I had so much laughter today with babycinta. He never failed to make me laugh out loud. He never failed to make me cry due to his jokes. He never ever failed to do that and that's always the reason why I love babycinta so freaking muchhhhh! He act like a mad man today. He act like Cik Leh today (: . Boyfriend never failed to layan me. I can see he feel irritated and almost wanted to cry when I disturb, pinch and bite him all. Hahahaha! Cause can see he is super tired. But still, he layan me all the way. Kecian tau babycinta mira. ^.^ I can see how irritated he was with me. But I don't care because I want him to talk/laugh with me pasal tktau biler kiter akan jumper lagiiii tauuu! Besok mira keje ptg. Thurs safuan birthday and babycinta tk ikot. Friday stay at home day. Saturday pagi ajeee bole ketemu same dier pasal ptg mira kejer. Lamaa tau. Hence, I make use of today very preciously. I even when to the extend to tak naik bus 72 sampai bus yg ke 8 dtg, mira decide to naik taxi home. I even walk with babycinta and took taxi near his house so that I can spent time with him.

tapii kan, I'm starting to miss him already.

Babycinta gone to bed already. :( Kecian dehh dier. I benci sey dier masuk Bridge Leader. Tuu mcm cca under ite. Guide budak baru masuk skola. I benci when he been busy and tired with his BL trainning. Pagi2 dier kene bangun kul 6am. Dah tuu kuar siang. Kul 1 ptg gitu text mira. Kul 4pm aru abis everything. Sampai rumah lambat pasal tunggu kawan dier semua. Balik kul 8 terus tdo. Dier jarang sey text me. Call pun rushing nk letak. :( Takpeeela mira. Left besok and taaaaadddddaaa he all mine again! As per normal! (:

What i know is, I'm loving him so much as days past by. I need him every now and then. I wanna be with him forever. For the rest of my life. Saya cinta awak banyak sangat! (:

HAPPPPYYY NYEEEEE! IM DEEPLY IN LOVE WITH MY BABYCINTA SO MUCHHHH! xD

*miaaaaaaannnnngggggg faccccceeeeeeeee* ((:

And i apply for my Higher Nitec courses already! (:

Beside that, I'm so happy to meet my budak gemok petom today! Heeeheee. (: Went to eat at pizza hut and get to eat my Prawn AO like finally eh! (: Heee. I love my budak gemok so much. and i miss my other girlfriends too. And also I went to kak saufiah house today. To get my makeup stuff that she brought for me. And also we did some face makeup. ((:

Lapar lak perot nieee. heeee. nytes semua. I'll be back for more! (: makin rajin ehh mira update. heeee. (:

2011-01-10T19:13:00.001+08:00

I rindu boyfriend I sangat2. :(

2011-01-10T00:54:00.002+08:00

Assalamuailaikum diary!

( :

Mira happy sungguh nieee. Mira dah dpt kejer kt Mfm. Heeeehee. But still mira masih kejer pizza hut dong. Besok go interview kt mfm. But before that, durrah dtg umah mira dulu. So yeah. After that, teman durrah go alik skola pasal she wanna appeal for her h.nitec couse. Besok mira dah bole apply for h.nitec tapi mira tktau la nk apply tknk. cos i wanna apply for the early childhood under mendaki scheme. But ntahlah. Mira pun tktau. I havent make the decision yet.

Beside that, I'm so freaking happy with the kejutan yg babycinta mira bagi tauu. Heeehee. Yesterday night kan we have a lil fights about something and he didn't even text me tau tadi pagi. Mira make the first move to text dier lagi. Dier layan mira pun mcm nk tknk. Mira pun sad lahh. Sekali tadi biler fiza dtg umah mira utk go work same2, dier bwk plastic bag mini toons and give me cakap roy bagi. Terus mira terkejot. I asked when dier jumper roy semua and aper roy ckp. Sweet tau babycinta mira nieee. Fiza ckp roy nak bagi mira kejotan. This few days mira asyik grumpy2 pasal mira kan uzur and dier stress pasal tk abes2 mira marah dier. heee. sweet kan. Dier kasi bear monyet pasal dier kater mcm mira. Kan roy panggil mira monkey. Beh kat bear tuu ader tulis monkey love. Heee. siap dgn gambar kiter and chocolate fav lagi. Happyy sey mira! ( : awwww, i love you so much la doggy!

cute kan? nk marah dier lame2 pun cannot tau cos i sayang same si dog nie manyak2 urhhhh! ( :

2011-01-09T12:18:00.003+08:00

what i fear most in relationship,

what i hate most in relationship,

what i dislike most in relationship,

ALWAYS HAPPENED.

It's hurt me freaking much. I trust him so much. I didn't share it with anyone. I keep it myself. Whatever his reason is, whatever his excuses is, I forgive him. But I can't forget. He have the cheek of not telling me everything till I found it by myself. I repeat, BY MYSELF. with help of no one. But not in one time. Bit by bit the truth came out. :(

Dear diary, what shall i do? It hurt me so much.

2011-01-06T21:34:00.002+08:00

Assalamuailaikum diary! ( :

Mira sungguh bored now. Boyfriend tersayang tengah tidor. When mira awake dier tdo, when mira tdo dier awake. Beh lau mira nk tdo, dier tk kasi tauu. Semalam sampai mira nanges kt dier. Hahaha. cos dier perangai when mira ckp mira nk tdo. Mira dah lahh ngantok sesangat plus mira makan ubat. doctor dah siang2 warn yg ubat batok mira tuu bole buat org ngantok. But baby mira swweeett like gula2 honey bee tuu! Dier pujuk mira n put me to sleep. Rindu sangat kat dier. Dah dua hari kiter tk bertemu. Bertentangan mata. Ahhh cheyy! Feeling sweet pulak mira nie.

So basically, I did nothing much. I didn't attend to work for two days straight as I've been coughing like hell non stop. Plus flu plus fever. Mira dah macam sotong lembik. But best tau saket. Dpat manja2 ibu. Actually i thought of going to work today but abah tk kasih. Ahh cakap pasal abah. He been extra sweet like a sugar to me. He been asking me to eat my medicine. He brought me gula2 batok and all. He even brew for me barley to drinks. ( : Both of my parents are so sweet. i love both of you till my last day in this world tau.

Speaking of work, I make up my mind to quit Pizza Hut. Sayang memang sayang lurh. sedih memang sedih. walaupun dah byk kwn mira yg melayu yg mira sayang dah blah dari situ and I'm the only one who stays there. Mira dah anggap semua mcm family especially yg keling2 walaupun org cakap mulut dieorg mcm sial, mira tetap anggap dieorg mcm family. Mira sayang kt dieorg. Im the type of person yg tk kesah org nk ckp aper tentang org yg mira sayang. Dah sayang kan nk buat mcm aner. Kalau org nk sial dgn kiter mesti ader sebab. sebab2 nye kiter pun ader salah. kiter manusia tk perfect. but kadang2 true jugak. Mulut keling. Alaaaa. pergi mati lah dgn tu semua. Mulut manusia kiter tk boleh tutup.

Mira nk berenti pun cos starting from next week pun kak ilah, rgm mira ckp full timer work fullshift every weekdays and part timer cumer bole kejer weekends. Boleh mati sey gitu mcm. beh kiter part timer mcm maner? But it's understandable lah. Full timer kiter pun alot of phillipines. Org2 philip semua susah. Kecian mira tgk dieorg. It's ok.

So yeah, I will be finding new job. Insyallah, this week will be my last week working. Maybe I wanna try NTUC at nex mall. Maybe at mfm. Maybe at Isetan. Tgk lah mcm maner. Saper2 nk kat mira. Insyallah, kalau rezeki murah, ader kt mane2. Yg penting usaha mau ader. true?

( :

YEAHHHNESSS! boyfriend bushuk mira dah wakey2. Happy nyee. But mira dah nagntok sey. Mira aru lepas makan ubat. But mira nk tunggu kul 11. Nk check gaji. Sejak mira ader ibanking, dah senang mira nk check gaji through internet.

Nariee rumah bosan lahh. Adek teha tkder rumah. Camping tiga harriiii. Best tuu best. But boring lah jugak dier tkder. Bosann Oiii. Sekarang kt rumah tinggal mira, abah and ibu. Ibu dah tidor, abah tengok tevvee. Abang idk go where. working i think.

Besok mira nk goo buy lipstick Mac yg honeylove tuuuu! Heeeheee. ( : Like finally ehh. Dari last year raya mira nk sey tk buy2. Going out with sedara2 tersayang. Like finally ehh! Pastu go bugis jalan2. Pastu mira kene kejer. Bosan seyyyy! Adoiii.

Klah. mira dah bosan. Maybe nk tukar blogskin uh lau rajin. Nak main game dulu nieee.

Tata!

Mwahs!

2011-01-05T13:35:00.004+08:00

Dear diary! ( :

I'm down with fever, bad cough and flu. :(

Waiting for the clock to reach 3 pm. After ibu finished work, will be going to the doctor with her.

nk mati agaknye. I feel so down too right now. Boyfriend perangai. :( I cry when fiza and eyfa text me asking me to eat my medicine and get well soon. Sedihh. True enough, my girlfriends understand me more. I'm suck in relationship. Roy mcm nk complaint n ckp yg i tkder time utk dier. Mira sedih sangat. Boyfriend only know to complaint. True that I don't have time for him. I'm not like his friend's girlfriend how always have time for their boyfriend. I'm not the type of girlfriend that patronize my boyfriend all the time. I hate to be stuck in the situation where I have to choose between boyfriend and girlfriends. I hate it when boyfriend always wanna meet me. True, I miss him too. But at the same time, I'm working. I have my family. I have my friends. My world doesn't revolves around him only. :( And now, he gone all silent. I hate it. I hate it so much.

N i miss chatting with mirah aci so much. :( I miss my girlfriends too. :(

..................I miss single life. :( Where just me. where only me who decide my own life. I'm feel that I'm too young for all this. God, please help me. :(

2011-01-03T15:28:00.001+08:00

nk nangis bole?

2011-01-02T15:33:00.001+08:00

i feel like giving everything up! I'm not strong to face this over and over again.

Tidak kusangka jadi begini
Terpisah jua kita akhirnya
Aku sendiri tidak mengerti
Sungguh pilu di hatiku

Untuk melepaskanmu demi kerana
Ku masih sayang, sayang padamu
Terbangkit resah di dalam kalbu
Terhimpun rindu (sayang)
(Luka cintaku)

2011-01-01T02:40:00.004+08:00

HAPPY 2011 dear diary. ( : include this post there's 595 post in total. Thank for always being there when i need you dear diary. To share my sorrowness and happiness I had for the past 2 years. I'm really grateful. ( :

so basically today i did something. haha. I went to boyfriend's house with fiza to get my laptop back as i'm having some conflicts with him. Then off to work. Work was awesome. I had so much laughter with them. Rush them to do their closing as quickly as they can. I wanted them to watch the fireworks at the 40th story there. Was damn awesome time spent with them.

My new year 2011 resolution is :

not to cut my hair length. (: nk long hair! **very important sekali!**
Last forever with dearest cinta. less fights! insyallah. *very important*
Spent more time with family and girlfriends. *very important!*
get my license bike asap when reach legal 18th! ***VERY IMPORTANT SEKALI**
Focus on school work. *important*
Learnt to appriciate what i have. *very important!*
LEARN how be more patience. Insyallah! ((: *important*

So basically, I been having a lot of fight with dearest boyfriend. :( Its been a long time since we fought and yesterday was the worse fight we ever had. But it was so sweeeett. Both of us were crying otp. And I don't know what got into me this few days. I been crying alot for him. gembeng nahh. Hahaha. I'm just scared of losing him. I swear I love him too deep now. He wasnt himself the past few weeks. He keep scolding me over small things.

And just now was worse! I didn't pick his call up. I didn't reply to his text. I even ignore me and He even utters the word break up. That was the first time. But thank god luckily fiza was with me. Fiza helped me alot. Thank bestfieee! ( :

But i know and i believe that no matter what happened, how we fought, I believe boyfriend love me and only me. I want to change. I don't want to scold him over small things. I want to things to be better for 2011. insyallah.

boyfriend, thank for everything you done for me. me love u many2! MWAHHHHHH! *BIG BIG HUG AND SMOOCHIES!* heeee. miannnggg.

oklah! Mira dah ngantok nieee. nyte semua. besok kejer pagi lagiii. boyfriend kt luar dgn kawan2. sedih nahh tk dpt join pasal tadi kejer and besok kejer. adoii. Hahaha. nyeteeeee!

2010-12-28T01:44:00.003+08:00

I'm supposed to go to bed by now. But since I can't go to bed, I decided to write on ur my dear diary. Nari mira do nothing much. Went to nyayi house ajee. Fiqah and naufal kat situu. Supposedly mira kene kejer gantikan tempat iqah but mira suruh fiza gantikan. This week mira keje all petang. So sape2 nak ajak kuar pagi, sudah tentu boleeee. ( :

Hmmmmm. Bosannnyeeee.

Roy dah bobok dah siang2. Roy nye handphone rosak. Software dier semua hilang and that's caused it to rosak. :( Mira sedih laaaa. Dah susah nak contact boyfriend. Lagi2 this past few days kiter byk mcm tk btol. Dier mcm not himself. Dier byk kasar dengan mira. Bobal pun tk btol. This is what I hate. Selalu biler mira bobal kasar semua, dier sabar la aper lah. When mira dah start berlembut, start uh dier nye naek kepala. Dier lak yang banyak kasar2 dgn mira. lelaki yg mira dpt semua gituu. But royyy lain. Alhamdulilah. Mira bersyukur sangat ader dier dalam hidup mira sekarang. Syukur sangat. I want to appreciate him. Mira tknk nanti biler dier dah tkder aru mira nk menyesal. Mcm dulu yg pena jadi dlm hidup mira dulu. Insyallah tk. Mira sayang boyfriend mira sangat2 tauu! Mira harap mcm aner kiter gaduh, We are still strong! Mungkin at times, mira ego but mira tk meant on what I've said. Kadang2 kate2 marah mira tuu hanye kata2. Fact is, Mira sayang roy sangat2. Hanya allah saje yang tauuu!

Oklahh mata mira dah layuuu nie. Time for bobok. Besok pagi2 nak go teman adek belik buku sekolah adek. And Roy pun temannn! Yeahhhh! Tak sabar nak jumper buah hati mira nieeee.

Selamat malam semua.

Assalamuailaikum. (:

2010-12-25T00:46:00.006+08:00

Dear Diary,

I'm supposed to go to bed by now. But I just feel like updating you. I'll be working at 1oam till 10.3o pm tomorrow! :( I wonder if i can wake up or notttt. Goshhhh.

So basically, what I did today is i to woke up 10plus to accompany wak yah send her gubahan at her friend's house. After that, I followed her to geylang to get some gubahan for this sunday. This sunday will be kak suha's tunang! ( : excited oiii!

Reached home at 4 pluss. straight went to bed. Didn't went to nyayi house. Around 6 plus, I woke up and do some house chores.

Suddenly received call from boyfriend. Saying he's at the hospital due to his leg. He sprained his leg while playing soccer. and he passed something to his bestfriend and asked me to went down to my block. And I did. To my suprised, I saw boyfriend! Awww sweet kan dier? Dengan kaki dier yang tempang. ( : But we did have fight cos I had was all the way lecturing him. He say he miss me a lot! ( : Boyypriend saya sunngguhh maniissss! ( :

Boyfriend gave me a bracelet. Thank cinta! ( : I swear I love you so much dog! <3

2010-12-23T23:51:00.002+08:00

Dear Diary,

I'm currently waiting for the clock to faster tick tock to 12 midnight! Time at lappy shows 11.55am. I wanna be the first to wish cinta on our first monthsary. I don't want him to wish me first. ( :

Eh eh jap ehhh. Dah 12.oo nie. wanna send the message that I've already prepared for my dear boyfriend.

Ok. I'm done. ( : Y E A H ! he lambat. I first. lol. Eh jap. Ader message nie. Mesti dari boyfriend! <3>

Awwwww! Boyfriend : ( I miss you so much. Can't meet you today. I've promised wak yah to follow her to send Pulut and then will be off to nyayi house. Dah lame tk jumper nyayi. Nyayi saket2 this few day. Awwww. Miss her so much.

okok. Nak otp dengan boyfriend! <33333333333333333333333333333

CINTA DIER MANY2! <3333

2010-12-22T21:52:00.001+08:00

2010-12-22T02:09:00.009+08:00

Dear diary,

today was the most tiring day for me which i don't know why. I was so grumpy during work. I didn't sleep late yesterday but nahhh I don't why. My body ache alot. After work, went to Serangoon Nex Mall with sister. Had a great laughter with her. We both brought a dress. (: Brought dinner for family at KFC. and guess who i meet just now? Nithia bff! Goshhh! Its been long time since we last meet. Had a great laughter with her. awesome. And maybe i'll be applying at her workplace. well. depends.

And now I'm home. I'm bored. Currently chatting with kak fie. Boyfriend at his friend's place. Boring nyeee. Dier tk layan mira. sibok sangat dengan game dier. haiyak! :( Since I'm bored I decided to do some story telling on what I did for the past few days oke? (:

Sunday. 19 december 201o.

Had dinner at Kampung Chai Chee Restaurant with dad's side. Wak borhan treat as it was his birthday. The food was awesomeeee! Beside that I Had alot of fun with beloved cousin! Its been a long time since we had this kind of family gathering. I had a lot of laughter with nana, eiynaa and amin.

PICTURES! ((:

Monday; 20th december 2010

It was iqah first day of working at Toa Payoh Pizza Hut. It was awesome! ((: Biaselah, siti kalau dah kanchiong. Hahaha. After work, slack with boyfriend, iqah and annaafi at Toa Payoh Rooftop Garden. The 40th story. I had so much laughter. I laughed like nobody business. Due to that, in the end, me and boyfriend had an argument. Big argument till I leave him and walk away. And trust me, due to my anger, I went down the not by lift. By the staircase. fuhhh. Orang tua2 selalu cakap, jangan ketawa banyak2, nanti menangis. Trueeeeeee! But at the end of the day, both of us are fine. Thank god. I never want anything bad to happened to this relationship. (:

PICTURES((:

Tuesday;21st december 2010

I was awake by annaafi's phone call. Asking if I can helped him to send fiqa to woodlands polyclinic as fiqa throat due to to her thyroid are getting worse. And I agree with as I will be working at 4. At the same time, I did promised boyfriend to meet him before I went to work but since fiqa is ill and nobody to accompany her, I decided to cancel my plan with boyfriend. And boyfriend was unhappy about it till we had some little arguments. To make things better, I called my manager and told that I won't be able to make it to work. And so yeah, waited for quite a long time at the polyclinics. So after that, went to makan with her at S11 and slacked at her house with annaafi. Boyfriend arrived at 6 plus. Then we went to sheng shiong and walk around woodlands. Slacked at fiqa's house again till 9 plus and boyfriend send me home. ((:

PICTURES((:

I loveee you so much my man! I swear I really do love you so much! (:

2010-12-18T00:15:00.005+08:00

Dear diary,

I had an awesome day today. Basically today was my off day. Supposed to work today but I had already planned with my babyboy! ((: So I met him early morning la. Went down to his place at 11.3o in the morning. Babyboy didn't had his sleep for the whole night as he just came back tonning at his friends place. Reached him place and goshhhh! 3 cats. Monster. I was scared lurhh. Nasib His maid, bibik was at the house too. So yeah, slack here and there.

At around 2 plus meet fafa inside the cab and meet safuan. awww. Fafa really make effort to save her relationship. I feel you baby. One thing I admire her is she do really care and love safuan but in her own ways. You know, some girls tanpa segan silu, get wat i mean? So yeahh. Back to the stories, we had our late breakfast cum lunch at KFC. ape lagi, Black pepper chicken lurhh! Heeehee. And we slacked around hougang mall roof top. Slack and slack. Jokes here and there. Few hours later, teha came and join us. Had an awesome day with them. Too much jokes! I love you guys so much! <3

Pictureeeeeeeeeee (:

You know what boyfriend, I am so grateful to have you. You show me a lot of love, care and concern. I'm so lucky to have you. Each time we have fight, you never failed to make me smile back. You never failed to make me laugh. will come down to my place when I refused to pick up your calls and reply to ur text. not only once baby you did that. countless. Baby, no one have ever done that. Yesterday was the sweetest things you done for me. Came down to my workplace to gave me my favorite Kinder Bueno randomly. Thank baby! I swear I love you! Give me a few more times to get over all those past. :/

&& My Mind Tells Me To Give Up..
But, My Heart Just Won't Let Me..

2010-12-16T09:37:00.002+08:00

I don't know why. I just can't go on this way. After telling boyfriend everything, its him that im still thinking of more. I just feel liken giving everything up. :( After all those trying, I still failed.

2010-12-13T22:17:00.002+08:00

2010-12-13T22:00:00.002+08:00

For the rest of my life, Mohammad Azroy Bin Ishak. Insyallah.

Eventhough its hard, allah please help me. :(

2010-12-12T22:11:00.002+08:00

Upon hearing boyf's voice, I feel better. I wanted to tell him what I'm feeling now but upon hearing him calling me baby and sayang with his sick voice, I don't have the courage. I came to realize how patient he was with me no matter how I scolded him and all.

It's time to forget everything. I must keep trying. Insyallah, one day, I fully forget him and those memories. ( :

2010-12-12T21:46:00.002+08:00

If not, it will be our 1 year and 8 months today. I miss you so much. What shall I do? I don't want the same things to repeat again and again. At the same times, I don't want to tell boyf about this. :( What shall I do? I try but I still failed. :(

2010-12-11T06:46:00.002+08:00

I miss him badly. I try to control this feeling of mine. But I just can't take it. :( I can't believe after a long time of managing to be strong and forget about the past, I'm starting to think about it again. And this time round, I just can't believe that I've cried again due to missing him. :/ I want to share it with boyfriend but I just feel it unfair to share it with him again and again. I don't want him to think likewise. All this while, I've been complaining about this to him and its real unfair to him if I were to tell him again. Hais. What shall I do?

I been having bad dreams about him. why? I asked his little sister about him and she told me he's fine. Haissssssssssss. I FEEL SO USELESS. :/

2010-12-10T13:10:00.000+08:00

2010-12-10T11:17:00.004+08:00

Hello! I miss my girlfriends so much! : (

RINDUUU terutama sekali sama Fatin Atiqah, Siti Nurfiqah and Atiqah Durrah!

2010-12-10T09:42:00.002+08:00

I curik nie dari twin nye blog. heee. Just feel that it for me.

ader numer 24 lagii. Adoiii. :( Susah kan nk move on walaupun dah cube nye cube. :( But whatever it is, I'm glad that boyfriend never fails to support me from my back to look foward! Oh mira, please be fair with him.

2010-12-05T19:41:00.005+08:00

You know, we can fight like nobody business. We can shout/scream/get mad/laugh at each other but nothing can change the fact that I love you. At times, I'm confused with us. I gave up on us. But yet, you bring me up. You support me, gave me courage, be patient with me and never failed to give me encouragement each time I'm thinking back about the past. Even with you around, I'm still thinking of my past even its not often like how I used too. But yet, you will always give the non-stop encouragement. You told me what past is past. There's always a reason why he didn't make it to my future. You always told me whatever the past is, let it be. You know each time when you say all that, It gave me the spirit.To be strong. To forget the past. I thank god for sending you to me.

You see, as each days past. I love you so much baby! I don't want to lose you. Forgive me for my mistake. Thank you for enduring with me.

2010-12-05T01:43:00.001+08:00

SETIAP KALI MESTI GADUH! HARI2 GADUH! AKU PENAT AH DGN KAU! KALAU SATU HARI TK GADUH DENGAN AKU, TK BOLE PER!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

AKU BENCI KAU AHHH!

2010-12-05T01:16:00.003+08:00

Sayang fafa and boyfriend so much. This was taken on Friday night during lepak-ing session. I had so much fun taking webcam pictures with them. I love them so much ((: Thank you for the great day and moments. More pictures of me and boyfriend coming up! ((:

2010-12-05T01:07:00.003+08:00

Me and boyfriend webcam with iqah and her boyfriend. Had a awesome chatting with them. ((:

Meet up soon guys! ((: